miSsiE iN piNk

goodbye 2005.welcome 2006.

2005-12-31T16:38:00.000-08:00

ask me if i haf been good.i think i havent.i have been grappling throughout the year though.with truck of shit loads.but then again,2005 haf been a great year all along.there are many things that i learnt,discover,found and did.

2005:
ive found the best man a girl wud ever need- Imran.
ive found the best mates- Huda & ijah
ive found the best food lover-cum-bestie.. Sri

and yeah.thats about it.2006 is coming through.
everything will change and im excited.haha.
my resolution would be....
stop being a bummer and go tuition.
to at least study thrice a week.(i dont see it coming.wadeva.)

im equally nervous about taking my O's in 2006.
its too early for me.honestly.i wont do well.hmm.
that doesnt matter.what matters most is leaving damai the school of fuckers and go to temasek poly! yeaa.im gonna make it happen.
Hospitality & tourism management will be my choice!
(Food Sciences will be adequate too) hmm...

shites.problems.struggles.cries.
then again.2005 will always be a momento.

goodbye 2005.
welcome 2006.

2005 holiday.

2005-12-31T15:43:00.000-08:00

back from Genting,Kl,Port Dickson.
Let the pictures say it all.

plotting trends.

2005-12-17T22:56:00.000-08:00

somehow, i am aware that repeated words and ideas is not enough. When you say something, try not to repeat it. When you make mistakes, try not to repeat it. The next step should be to analyse whether there has been a change in the value of the repeated words or repeated attitude. i trully understand our situation imran, and i admitted i am in the wrong.

changes can take place through character development.i believe.and i think i am capable of changing.

[[on certain issues, people have to agree to agree.you keep telling him constantly that you love him but then, you ignore his feelings and treat it carelessly.]] *this is wher i go wrong*

Imran : you dont know what to believe, i said i love you yet,my actions speak otherwise.
at a point of time,u mite think dat way baby.ryte? i feel for you.and i am sorry.

imagine what would happen if we brought up a child by telling them one minute we loved them and the next minute, we smack them. they wouldnt know what to believe and how to trust that anything we said was true.

Iza, its all about body love and confidence.total body love and confidence are about every different part of you backing the others up so that you literally walk your talk, live your dreams, speak your truth and express your needs.

this post means alot to me.i am sorry imran for the many pains i caused.i am sure i wud be able to walk my talk,live my dreams,speak my truth and express my needs.i hope things wud get better between us.

the change in me made a huge impact on us.i realise that.and i am terribly sorry.

like the rugby match i watched yesterday. the PAST and the PRESENT.
i can list down the comparisons between them their temperament. and their freaking body shape.haha.the most obvious among all.

i am sure YOU can list down the difference between the PAST IZA and the PRESENT IZA wich u don like. many preferred the old iza. i trully fathom the reason why u love the old iza very much.

Kudos to Nurmarriza and our love life.
my heart still beats for US.i love you.

2005-12-09T00:55:00.000-08:00

okay.so i havent been blogging for a week.
thank you all for tagging.
i am gonna miss you babe!
bawak balek bende untuk kiter tau!

Monday
had my first tuition for the month.all was fine.studied physics.hmm.my tutor tryna boost my confidence i tink becoz shes been advicing me on bof lessons.monday and wednesday.heh. imran fetch me and i insisted on accompanying him to get a job.so he insisted that i cant go.it was disappointing but then again.give him some space.hee.

Tuesday.
out wif Hun and my cousins.i guess it went pretty well.the photos.gosh.*blurp*
and the nite time.hurhur.WELL SPENT.i love you Hun.*many many kisses*

Wednesday.
out wif Sri.*coolness* haha.the things we do are just between me and you. nahh. basically had lotsa fun and like double trouble.hee.i cried.gosh.susa laa nk lepaskn kau.haha! especially when yur off to melbourne for 13 days.haiyo.sedih nyer.takec are yea.i am gonna miss you! muah!

Thursday.
off to Fatimah's house at Sembawang.family comittee members stuff.did the nametag.all thanks to kak baby. planned for the upcoming chalet events barbecue and stuffs.the games luks interesting.kak huda has a problem calling some relatives.*winks* hee.since its so far and im super LAZY to go home mysef i slipover.hurhur.it was fun being squeeze like sardine by Syafiqah.haha.and since we cant slip,we had this eye game.haha.she freak out when i open my eyes big in the dark.*ghost of me*

Friday.
woke up by the sound of my fone.ishkk.my cuzin said he wasn to borow my cam.okayy.den cant slip.and fiqa and fat woke up.haha.the 3 of us were like sneezing all the way.the aircon is so cold.ishkk.wake up and watch sky high.great movie.had beef steak for bfast,yum yum.den chill2 for abit and get ready to go home.yayness! im home.
today is quite a bad day i tink.many many bad news and Hun and i dont know whats gonna happen to us next.i am really sorry but i hope i havent been a burden to you.i love you.

MIMI!!! take care aytes.i am gonna miss you alot.muahhh!

2005-12-01T23:42:00.000-08:00

im living my life.ONLY with my man.
*Friends,they come and go*

2 weeks mc for my mum.
has brought us much much closer and as for her much much pokai.
im happy that bof of us are cool ryte now.
shes aredi starting to accept my kinda style.somehow she seems more understanding.*i think*
and im starting to be much more patient with her than i olwaes am.

wednesday.
off to bugis wif mum.
got a beach bag.cool.
owel,she chose it for me and she pays for it.so i listen.hee.
browse for shoes.
tried lecoq sportif.white and gold.
super nice but no size.
raffles city tried anader lecoq shoe oso no size.*sheesh*
*sad*sad*
go sakura for dinner.*oat prawns*yumyum

thursday
off to marina sq wif mummy.
decided on pony.no size.so reserved one at suntec.
off we went der.
bought body shop loose powder.
*poof* the person dint reserve for me.
so went to marina sq back and get the display one.*ishk*

today.
clean my room.vacuum the house.
*good girl*

havent been meeting him for a week.i miss you.
we are good children.we'v been stayong home for a week.
i love you.

Happy 8mthsary!

2005-11-27T14:00:00.000-08:00

Friday.
towning til late nites.
suppose to catch a movie but there wasnt any available show.
instead we shopped.
Topman Lido.
bought him 2 tops.
black and green.*i love green*
i got mysef a top at topshop too.*green*hehe.
dint know wher to go so tought heading home will be the best thing to do.
suppose to transfer train at city hall.
and he thought of going to marina square.
it was too early to go home then.
i tink it was the first time i bought him crunchie just to make him smile.hah!
marina square is undergoing changes.hurhur.
replaced my white hairband to a green one.=)
rastafari is superbig.coolness.
lastly,i bought him anader puma top.
the one hes been asking for.
the salesman is such a freak.i guess he thought we were out of cash and dint bother to approach us.moreover,the shop was closing.haha.in the end we approached him for a new piece.haha.we do haf cash!
imran was super hapy once he got the top.*macdonald smile*

saturday.
Happy 8mthsary!
as planned.
watch a rugby match at Sentosa.
due to our "punstuality" the game has ended once we were about to reach.
bah.
fetched Hun at his place and off to Lido to exchange Hun's clothes.
on the way to MRT,we bought sushi! at tangs supermarket.
the journey to harbourfrount was super cool.
i love the NEL.hehehe.
and the "dirrty LiL secrets".thanks to him for making me smile the whole journey
ouh.and not forgetting the "izinkan".
reached harbourfront and i was pleading to tkae the cablecar instead of bus.hurhur.
in the end,we decided on BUS.
by the time we reached Sentosa and settled down,it was aredi 3+.
it took us forever to reached to a suitable place for us to settle down.super far.
in the end settle down bawah pokok depan laut.hahahaha.it was just US ther.
had our lunch.sponsored by Mr Mohamad Imran Fadzlan.
he cooked Fried Rice,Ayam masak merah,Nuggets & Fillets.
the surprising thing was.
he suggested we took pix for our food.we survived on that food the whole day.
haha.den we changed to anader port.there was red ants all over.
fussy us."semut hitam nmpk makanan jadi giler!"
must u exaggerate the phrase pa?
evrywher we sat he was like sindir2 yng semut tu nnt jadi giler klau kiter letak mknan kt situ.ishk!i know laa my malay is super BLUNT.
in the end settle down under a hut.bacer newpaper tgthr2.haha.i read faster than u do! bluekk!
movie slots at 735.Lido.Exorcism of Emily Rose!!
plead plead plead him to bring me.
in the end abt 6 we left Sentosa and off to Lido.
tix were sold out.the next slot was at 930.
disappointed giler.so chilled outside Lido.
saw huda,Fai,Hydil,Nadiah,Zareena.
while waiting for taufik to reply the msg.whether or not Hun can catch a 930 movie.
skit pe lmbt reply.in the end he said yes.i was so elated.
kaboom! tix selling fast.in the end seats da mcm aper.solo2.cudnt utter a single word knowing i cant watch the movie.
chill kat luar lido.and whoossh! i cried! stoopid siak.
Imran was super funny and he made me laugh.had crunchie again.
boom! i saw fie.freaky!!!!!!
headed to taka and we bof were silent.
im sorry yea? i smiled widely not becoz i was happy to meet him laa.haiyo.chill aytes?
Perlini Silver's rantai is much nicer.next time i buy for u der laa.instead if cineleisure ok?
there was toys fair! *excited*
he wanted to buy me the carebear limited edition.i tot it was a waste of money.
beli bende lain untuk i kan lagi mulia.=) *hinting*
off to heeren.dint get anything.
tankiu for twisting me around yur arms and make me luk like as if im drunk after u bought the root beer that luk like as if its an alcoholic drink.tipu seyy.
i told him i feel like eating the strawberry dip in choc.
taadaa! as we were walking we saw a boothe selling fruits wher u can dip it into a FOUNTAIN of choc yurself.super cool.buy 2 get 1 free.rock melon and strawberry and we got free marshmallows.yum yum! belgian chocolate thats why expensive.haha.NOT MY MONEY.
*bluekkk*
headed home by bus.the trip home was great except for the irritating matrep and minahrep couple.yikes! hate them.
enjoyed the chocs in the bus.yummy!!

Super Long.

2005-11-25T14:32:00.006-08:00

been goin thru lotsa things but erm..i cant remember..hurhur..

19 Nov.
i think it started off today.
ya ya true.haha.kk.
met imran and off to lido to mit his frens.
ont he way ther.woohoo! imran said i was pretty.
maner tak nye.fork out 20 bux for a darn skirt.
(actually lawa la jugak kan?)
*macdonald smile*
so we were late.were we? haha.
did nothing much.
search for my bday present which huda ask me to chus.
havent decided on anything just yet.erm.not to soon.haha.
enjoyed the last bit of it at esplanade and the trip back home in MRT.
left arnd 1030.
MRT=public nuisance
haha.too much laughter brought tears into my eyes.
it was never easy to say goodbye hun.

20 Nov.
met my fellow relatives at expo.
Goodness Gracious.i love batrisyia.
hahahahahaha.*popcorn & the balloons bebeh*
off to suntec to buy a new fone!
for a phone,4 fams haf to follow.
hurhur.cool cool.
the coolest thing is.
i haf a fone in my room!
pros: i can use it anytyme i want.
cons: it distubs me while im sleeping!
CONFIRMED.
holiday at KL.finally! S.H.O.P
"yng enjoy pmpn2 je ah.shopping"
my dad told me that! woohoo! kire mcm green lite ah dpt shopping.*goodies*
looking forward to go Genting.
the last tyme i when was like years ago.
when my late uncle stil lives.
*cold*cold*i wnat go by train!!
i heard mum said we will go by train while cik Jo's family wil go by car.hmm.
that is SUPER COOL.

21 Nov.
*kaboom*
receif news.bloody fucker.
so much for trusting you girl.somehow i know ure gonna read ths but i dont think u know who i am referring to.i dont quite say what u tink i did.many many things i can do rather than bitching bout yur life.consisting of yur studies and yur BGR.ouh and the way you dress.
*yikes!*
i so don care bout beauty.well.inner beauty plays the most important part.
i will never look up on you again.i shall do my own thing.
on top of that,got scolded by my mum about this bloody shyt.
i can understand how mum feels.forget it mum.
dad says i shud just give it my best and ignore whatevers happening.yeaa man.
let my O's be the judge.
off to jB wif my fam.
dad got 4 days MC for having sore eyes.

22 Nov.
went ICA.haha.identification card.met aslam der.*bluek*
tkbleh extent passport.haha.
embarked on frevasizztarnized photo album.
yay! i haf my own foto album of my besties 2005.
*memories*

23 Nov.
congrats darl! haha.turn out to be the champs for the rugby comp!
woohoo! i love you! muacks!
i wudnt wanna go support you.im lucky i dint.or u'd haf hugged me when yur covered wif mud.
haha.proud of you sweetie.the last glory for bedok south? hmm.hehe..

24 Nov.
towning wif my fam.
took pictures wif christmas lightings! yay!

bday bash wif sri pics..

Nonetheless...i Love You..

2005-11-19T12:52:00.000-08:00

huda wished me yesterday!! tankiuk!
Fiqa did too earlier this morning..heheheheh...

miting hun later arnd 5.
missing him.*sobs*sobs*
miting his dear friends then.

im not looking forward to them.
but im looking forward to him.

*pray*pray*
u must be selected for the beach rugby aytes.
star player of Northern Knights katekan.
26th i go support you at Sentosa okay?
*habba*habba*
beach....here i come..wee!~

Turning 15..

2005-11-16T15:52:00.000-08:00

spent the last day of being 14 with boo.

*poof* ben & jerry's ice cream for me.
haha.actually i wasnt hinting anything when i told u ther was a ben & jerry stall at the zoo.
(i visited the zoo on Sunday)
aww.stil.i got to taste the sweetness of chocolate and brownie flavour.
hmm.nice nice.
get this imran.
*kalau berbuat baik,balasannyer pon baik jugak
i tink it goes dat way.it shud be a saying.but owel.rake up a new one.hurhur.
the ice cream is to replace my burfday cake.so thoughtful.=)

headed to town.
REJECTED the offer of getting the canterbury polo tee,puma tee as abirthday present.
its a good thing i rejected it becoz after we left the puma boutique he said
"actually i nak belikan u baju adidas..yng u nak tu.."
my heart was jumping for joy.hahahaha.
*ive decided

had dinner at fish n co.
super duper licious!
yum yum!
he REJECTED the offer of havin an ice cream wich was on the house.
ape cakap.seafood platter was delicious.
the sharkie freeze.ive yet finished it! hmph!
he ended his meal before i did.
was tryna finish up the drink when he said
"tk kenyang2 lagik ker?"
ishk! rezeki tu!! susa dapat tau imran blanjer fish n co.hahahaha.
all was well.the celebrations was simple yet superb.
i enjoy myself hun.
thank you.i love you.

14.11.2005
1030-Fatimah Zahra

15.11.2005
the clock struck 12 and i got a msg from imran.
1238-Naim
0115-Mummy
0808-Fudgey
1557-Katy
1717-Fatimah
2210-Zaid
2330-Hasanah
SMS greetings.=)

wasnt allowed to go out.BANNED.
in the end,i did and was spose to reach home b4 7.
curfew on my burfday is terrible.
out wif sri,sha,mok,aim and min.
dint know the plan so just go along.
bowl at ecp.met min der.
den saw kak lyni at the waterbreakers.
den headed to Suntec.
by bus.and they actually completed the messy birthday card of mine in the bus.
and thats bad.haha.
i think i shud appreciate it still.
bought my present at Suntec.
Pink or Brown?
ended up with brown.thanks babe.
den off to the convention hall and had 2-for-1 pizza and a small strawberry cake.
strawberry cake=SWEET
abg im and rajesh were there.

expected a birthday wish from my dad but he dint.
BIG DISAPPOINTMENT.
dint receif any from huda too.
oh well,whatever.
Me and Him.

Before.

The Seafood Platter.

The Sauces.

AfterMath.

Birthday Girl's Plate.

Seafood Platter=Goner

Imran's Plate after feeding me the Prawns.=)

The Dirt Plate Beside Imran.Bluekk!

Presenting the Newly Weds & Sharkie Freeze

Our Newborn!

I Love You.

2005-11-12T14:02:00.000-08:00

Tuning to: Peterpan-Mimpi Yang Sempurna

met imran yesterday! wohoo! nice nice.
so sweet of u to accompany to all the shops i went in.
haha.Body Shop pon dier masok.
record kan number number lagi.tankiuk! heheh..

3 hours well spent sweets.
World War 3 just ended for us and i am not looking forward to World war 4 dear.
living in guilt for the past few days.
i dont want more.

so,are you gonna get me the adidas long sleeve tee i said that was nice?
if you arent then maybe i'l get it mysef.heheheh.=)
unless you are gonna pay for the tee that we bof are gonna get.
u know.the one that we planned to buy same same to wear on the 19th?
hehehehehe.

tankiuk for the swensens ice cream.heh.new flavour der.=p
*you drop my peach!

high hopes fall apart when u called me just now sweets.
i was looking forward to Sunday.
the excitement came rushing in when you said yur gonna bring me out for dinner on Sunday.
but later dashing hopes was what i encountered.
and u said we will celebrate my burfday on Monday.
you said we would haf dinner under the shining stars.
and i said i wanted to be accompanied by Liveband.
and u said "yur wish is my command"
so Monday it will be.
honestly the feeling sucks big time.
still,appreciate the thought of celebrating it on Monday.

you made plans with yur frens to haf an outing on the 19th.
i will not disappoint you.i will make it.
and i tink you agreed to go out with my frens one day becoz u wan me to cum along on the 19th.
i am glad.but i hope u made the decision sincerely.=)
i wont force you into doing something wich u dont like.
Liberty of your own Life.

katy planned for a day out wif me and sri.on the 25th.
sri,if yur reading this,pls take note!

I love Imran.
I love Katy.
I love Mimi.

2005-11-09T13:23:00.000-08:00

i dont know wheres Imran.
called him no answer.
the next paper will be at 2 i tink.
and the eng ppr ended 1155.
and i havent heard from him.

woke up due to hunger.
off to the kitchen and *poof* i cant see a thing.
it was like BLANK.
mum panic.hurhur.den sit down close eye for afew minutes den can see the world.fuh!
had laksa for bfast.yummy.

was too lazy so went back to lala land.
den surprisingly search for my holiday hwk.
den off to the comp.main game.kekeke.
and then mimi call.chatted wif her.
and off to lala land.

i miss imran.
just whats happening til i dint receif a single msg from you.

i think its kak zirah's burfday today
haha.happy 16th burfday!

New Skin

2005-11-08T16:20:00.000-08:00

Tuning to: Hadirnya Cinta- GSC

greenery soothes the eye of a viewer.haha.
simple layout and skin i got.
isit abit too simple? abit too easy for a blogger like me.ishkk!

lazing arnd at home after many days hanging under the scorching sun.

had great time at mimi's crib yesterday.
it fils great knowing that aim and am was ALRYTE.
hahaha.sha and i had this BIG question marks in our head.
and we can sense the aim was feeling abit uneasy.
hah.and i saw something in sumones fone.i forgot to tell mimi! woops!
many shots taken.
sorry babe,i left early.hurhur.
The Monday Kids!

Sha.Sri.Iza

Iza.Sha.

Soory! Yur not seen! haha

The Crazy Ones.

Iza:*beep* Beep* HeLo! asal cepat nah angkat tepon?

Imran: whispered "i nga mandi laa.u dengar tak?" sounds of water..

Iza: "I dengar yur mum berbual! Yur mum tk dgr ke u bebual kt dlm toilet?"

Imran: "U nie..mestilah dgr..k bye!"

Iza: "tanak! Nak dgr!"

Imran: "nak dgr ape? irritating ah!"

Iza:"Okay bye! nanti kol i!"

Imran: "Dont miss me! Bye!"

beep..beep..beep..

What wud it be like to swing on a star or walk on clouds?

Wud it be anything like wat i fil wen yur near?

im missing all of you babes...

2005-11-05T22:21:00.000-08:00

slamat hari raya to all...
late entry that is..

i havent got much to say except that
I MISS FREVASIZZTARNIZE badly..
babes,im nt sure if u girls are missing the day outs we used to haf..
as for me..i do..
tho i have imran by my side,i stil nid frens to come along..
upon graduating,i hope our friendship will still stay..

im hoping for anader day out with all of you..
Biggest 15th burfday present= a celebration with my fellow girls..

ive just finished viewing the video of the 4 of us at swensens..
i miss those times..ALOT..

i love u babes..bip me soon aytes..

Frevasizztarnized 05'

2005-10-31T21:37:00.000-08:00

*poof*
it became koko krunch..haha..im back!
busy wif raya preparations..clearing old junks and buying new to-be-old-junks.
got my hair perm yesterday thanks to my beloved sweetiepie.
i guess its the same old curls..it looks alryte to me now that he said it is better..haha..

i shant call this a tribute becoz i stil think that i can make it happen again.....
when there's a will,there's a way...im sure..

when we first got together..started hanging out..
we went shopping.. sri and i bought this roxy and gallaz stuffs..haha..cool..
towning was alot of fun.. we had our first lunch..at swensen's.. its nt lunch.. more of a snacky wcky kinda thing..
celebrated katybedah's burfday and that was the day we embarked on volcano..

urm..it was suppose to be earthquake katybedah..haha..denn we had our first video taken..its a video of us..basically,a video of katybedah opening her present and reading her super duper enormous card..she was elated after receiving the roxy sweater by us..haha..to be specific,huda and i went to purchase it at citylink ferst before miting the others..and we met ijat and all outside pacific plaza.. haha..and they embarked on this coca cola kinda thing..cool stuffs u guys..

then off to fudgey's burfday bash..
nonsensical stuffs occur..
plain stupidity..
its all over..
i guess i had fun bitching..
and we enjoyed the wholesome delicious yamiyam food..
i guess the picture says it all..
we were back so late..
i remembered clearly how i left home wif onli huda and ijah..
imran sent sri home..
and she was scolded by her dad i tink..haha..

14th march..Valentine's day..
well celebrated as SINGLES..
"Single and Lovin it" katybedah said..
i shall agree..
had our first lunch together at Far East Plaza..
the moks ended up finishing evrything..while the curls ate just a lil..
spent the evening watching 50 first dates..thanks to my mum for the bk treat wich includes free delivery to youth park..

den,on dat day,sri and i bought the topshop bag for the kakaks..and sri received a burfday present from me too..double happiness der..

26th of march..

anader day out for us..went to paya lebar for this malay event..the teenage kinda thing..den off to cineleisure for some pictures taken..and off i went to meet imran..the day he entered my life and turn me into what i am now..the best thing abt this outing is the preparations we had.. and the janji melayu we made..that was the day me n sri really understand huda...as in how late she can be..=)

racial harmony day..was a reunion for me and sri..heh..havent got much to say tho..

we then celebrated teacher's day..and had anader outing wich is suppose to be a get together kinda thing.. things were settled then..we were back together again..

following those days,we spent most of our time after school together..we dint had any outings for the moment..but there were a number of crisis..ups n downs of a friendship..we made it thru somehow.. after teacher's day we had anader outing..thats the latest for now..

MimimOk

all these while,u made me smile..yur the only one now..besides my man..thanks to you i cud sneak out at times..heh..we'v been frens for a year..and we did embarked on a halfway done blog..the next outing for us will be the 6th of dec..thats when we will be exchanging present for our 1 year anniversary..wich is spose to be 6th september..but due to some issues and short of cash,it was postponed..heh..=) i lurve being with yur family..especiali yur mum..as for yur lil sis.. well shes irritating but stil,she made me laugh..thanks for making the effort on the dancesteps.. heh..the times we had was awesome..upon graduating next year,i will still be with you..=) you've got a friend for life babe..

katybedah..

she still rock my world somehow..the messsages i got from her actually meant alot to me..well,it proves that i am not forgotten..heh..i guess its not high hopes..but a fact..thanks to her and also sri that i am still clinging onto POA..aku J kau babe..haha..dont worry..i tink yur not clinging on a just a thin line..becoz im still here for you..i hope things will get better between you and huda..u must make that happen..i suppose you enjoy tom's companion.. and at the same time,i hope HE is long forgotten..u get what i mean sweets? thanks for the many encouragement you've given me..i am what i am now partly becoz of you too..remember who emphasised the being independent kinda thing..and who said i shud move on..it was you..i shall declare myself the same old wurliza now that ive got more curls..haha..its true wad u said priorities changes after graduating..and i belive,the sun will shine even brighter after you left damai..and i shud agree that the time uve been spending in damai are just a waste..heh..

bonul..

we spent most of our time together after school..if u had realize it..u were the one who olwaes accompany me to the library when the other 2 are busy..you were the first one i knew among the 2 of dem..known you eversince primary school..but werent as close..at first when i was kinda closed wif katybedah,i cud sense that sumting will happen between the 3 of us..i feel you too..ive been in yur place..maybe not at that time but after that.. how sri,adz and i work things out and all..hmm..its basically the same thing wich i guess u went thru went ijah was kinda cloze wif me..owel,after those shytz, we'r back together.. i turn to you when i dint know if i shud take f&n..haha..i turn to you when i had problems wif f&n..thanks to you i found my man..not only do i found my man i understood him..thanks to the rugby match too..hahaha..it was you who told me what i shud do and what i shud not do when i am with him..heh..thanks to you,imran and i are still together..i hope u will not turn yur back on me babe.whatever reasons it cud be,please dont ever turn yur back on me..i guess we can talk things out so that its all smooth sailing..lets make it happen..i believe sri will be alryte after some brain washing and evrything.."Life's like a wave and you gotta kip surfing it" from you to katybedah..but was later brought down to bof me and sri..thanks babe..

what im asking for is..for frevasizztarnized to be back on track again..im not sure what i am suppose to do..i hope this entry kip u guys updated on how i am now.. after reminiscing the past,i really miss all of you..you girls make a lot of difference into my life..i think we ought to haf another outing maybe after raya..do get back to me if you girls still think ders such thing called frevasizztarnized again..i really wish i cud turn back the time..i miss all of you..i really do..

i love you babes..

Happy 7mthsary..

2005-10-26T13:20:00.000-07:00

Happy 7th monthsary imran!

honestly,i thought you'd forget that today's the day.was real sleepy yesterday nite but then when you called and asked "nk tido?" i was like.urmm.alryte denn.haha.the clock haventstruck 12 and u aredii wanna slip.hm.put down the fone and i started texting you.1206.sent the msg to you.a few moments my fone beep.it was you."happy 7mthsary!" heheh.takiuk! happy happy.i really thought u forgot.wasnt furious but disappointed.but well.i knew u dont favour celebrating it monthly.you'd prefer a yearly practice.but i dont.haha.and i put up a strong front by saying "nahh.its okay even if u forgot to wish me." haha.apart of me really mean it.but anader half of me dont.heh.and when you said "i love you wholeheartedly" i was like this is for real man. haha.

alryte.alryte.lets see.this is for you and only you.
u made my trip worthwhile imran.yur the MAN.7 months tight up with you.i don find my time wasteful.how patient can u be? lets see.heh.takiuk for being so tolerant.not evryone can put up wif my swing solitude.i dont know if u really mean what u said when you said the cookies i baked was delicious.haha.i hope you do.i dont want to end up like her.heh.i guess im not that voluptous. be frank.kekekek.its super duper cool knowing that my baby is afraid of me.bluekk!
well,all i meant to say is i love you..
nothing much from me to you this month..juz a heart full of love..just a smile that i hope do brighten up yur day..

happy 7 mthsary..

finally,its mine..

part 2

2005-10-24T23:00:00.000-07:00

imran told me i shud ignore it.
i thought so too.
glad imran dont take it too heart.
my conscience is clear.
i trust imran.
wassup with being couples but having no trust on each oder.
we'r better off alone then.
i love him.so what if they thought i am carellessly romanticly in love wif him.
or if they thougth im playing with fire.
i shall never be burn.
even if i am burnt,i dont regret having to know such a caring guy.
do they know us inside out?
ouh.they dont.on the surface,they thought we'r the typical couples.
oh.no.no.they are wrong.false remarks.
look at the many sacrifices he have made just to make me happy?
and look at how he has been brainwashing me into studying.
look at the improvements i made.
look at how mature i am now in thinking.
look at how wise i am now.
look at how i dare to dream now.
we'r not gonna fall for any trap laa.*wishful thinking on yur side*
on the other hand,u mean good.
but i seriously think imran and i shud be the onli people running this r/l.
he gotta know me inside out HIMSELF.
i gotta know him inside out MYSELF.

so u thought u were equal to imran while for my relationship with imran,he has the upper hand of it? are u tryna say that hes ruling me? no no.he knows whats best for me and he makes sure i get the best out of evrythink.it seems to me that evry decision he made is right.at times,i do speak for my ownself.i have a liberty of my own.

whatever happens between huda and imran was the PAST.they were friends and are stil friends.thanks to Huda that i got to know imran.whether or not imran dated me onli after a week of yur breakup,i cudnt careless.
if its true also,what am i sposed to do? hate imran for dating me after a week of breaking up?
hell no.i choose to be wif him at any circumstances.i decide.the fact that i knew imran was single for afew months.ive been believeing it.i cant be living in denial for 7 months! i don see why imran and huda shud lie to me.i mean.isit a big deal even if u date sumone right after a week of seperation? oh goshh.and u said u battle it out for 8 mths.tryna forget imran.or maybe love imran. why 8 months? no no logic.haha.when imran and i we'r onli turning 7 mth this oct.so the anader extra one mth means u guys have broke up la? i mean.thats wat i was told.haha.he dated me oni aft 1 mth of yur seperation.mysterious.

why wud imran lie to me when he dare to tell me that..
he used to drink..
he used to smoke..
he used to date other gurls even wen he was wif you..
he mosh in a pit wif my bestie..
why wud he lie to me abt when u guys broke up? haha.i don see the logic.hurhur.

yes.i am in love wif imran.but that doesnt mean my Iman aint strong.wassup wif Iman now? i mean why are we talking bout Iman?? glad to know that imran is doing his daily prayers and the friday prayers..when all his frens are making fun out of that..my goodness..16 year old boys acting like as if they were kiddies like "eee...awak gi sembahyang.." that matches the sentence "Imran gi smbhyng siol!"

i don bear any grudges against anyone.not even againt you.i thought we were already smooth sailing.thanks for tryna make it happen between me and imran.but we figured out that we are able to stand on our own feet.living our own dreams the way we want it too.

imran,i trust you.i love you for who you are now.put the past behind you.uve moved on with me. i hope yur as happy as i am.

i give you this give you that what you need love?
You know I got it holla at me if you need love
And affection cause i'll be your protection
Kinda hard job but i'll do it to perfection
And you can tell that I ain't tryna let you go

I ain't neva had nobody show me all the things that you done showed me
And the special way I feel when you hold me
We gone always be together baby that's what you told me
And I believe it
Cause I ain't neva had nobody do me like u

remember that song? goshh.it made a huge impact on me.hehe.i donno wat to say.really.all i ought to say now is.ive been trying to make it happen between us.and someday i know you'l understand what ive been trying to reach out to you.someday true love will be proven if He wants it to happen.as long as time stands still,we'l stay together thru ups and downs.like you said. it will olwaes be me and you.the fairytale will end wif a happy ending.
i love you imran.

part 1

2005-10-23T22:00:00.000-07:00

i met him yesterday!
it was hectic yesterday.
was supposed to attend azzeri's burfday bash at costa ecp.
mum allowed me to go.
dad was reluctant but mum said i shud just get ready.
as i got ready,mum told me dad said he wants to see what i'l do.
whether i put my frens ferst or whether i put my fam furst.
i was pissed when i heard this.
its like.we'r leaving to jb at arnd 5.what makes him tink that there wont be massive jams?
its he who olwaes said that we shudnt depart from spore arnd 5+ bcoz thats when motorists will be taking up most of the road.
and then.we wil waste our freaking time der.doing nuthing.and i tink by the time i reached jb the tailor has closed.
defeats the purpose dont you think?
imran said i shud just go wif my fam.
i cud sense the dsapointment.and the kedinginan of our r/l from the conversation we had.
i promised him aredi.becoz its like if we dint meet ystrday,the next time we'l be miting will be like anader week.thats so lamer.
as expected,massive massive jam.
made a u-turn and breakfast at spore.
den went to ikea.was stil figuring out how to sneak out to the chalet actually.haha.
saw haney-b at ikea.
left ikea arnd 10 den mum was like
"kau nak gi chalet tu?"
"err...sembarang ah.." okok.padahal nak.haha.
dad was like "kau balik kul bape kalau skrng abru kau pegi?"
mum: "alaa..biarkanlah..aslkan ade orang anta..kau overnyte?"
woahh.overnyte.i said see how.haha.
dad sent me der! happy happy meet my teletubby.
Hun said he cannot overnyte but must be hme at 3am.
totally fine wif me going home at 3am.
spent afew moments just wif him.
den to the chalet.urmm.pretty boring.
becoz i dint tok to anyone der except for Hun.
i cant utter a word.and i have no say.i wish i cud say...
"helo! can u stop drinking? respect Ramadhan!"
or.."can u not drink infront of Hun or he'l be so tempted."
or.."can u not drink infront of me becoz i don want to end up drunk!"
haha.even taufik told imran not to do anything stupid becoz it was ramadhan.
i was telling mysef "gosh.u shudnt onli say that juz becoz its ramadhan.u shud olwaes say that to imran." haha.
i thought i was anti-social.all along i was like sitting beside imran.waiting for the time when we shud all say "goodbye".and i thought imran dont like it.haha.but he prefers it that way.me sitting beside him and kiping my mouth shut.and i oso learnt sumtink new.MOS. what the hell.oh.so it was ministry of sound.i dint noe the short form was MOS.i onli knew abt the club. haha.who the hell sms imran and asked him along.haha.
then arnd 2 we left the place instead of a game of bowling wif his frens.
bleargh.i wudnt want to be wif his frens.i wud rather be wif him onli.
"so u sailed away..into a grey sky morning.."
hmm..it was never easy to say goodbye..i just hope he can accompany me this weekend to get my hair done..i miss you..dont worry..i had fun yesterday nyte..=)

detailed post there.
urm.friday,break fast wif my fam and sri at ecp.
she came tomy hse ferst.embarks on our blog.undone blog.haha.
and we realised that we've been tgthr for like a year and two mths.
060904.hehe.and we made a deal to exchange present this coming dec 6.
*grins* ape nak belikan.sheeshh.
den went to geylang.food fest.hurhur.
saw kak diyana's sons.Samuel Martin and Riski Martin.sumtink lidat.
chubby babies.Samuel wants me and not his mum! haha.
sri was like "setau aku kau tak suke budak2?"
haha.true true.tapi ni blom pndai bebual so it shud be okayy.haha.

went JB again just now.got my baju raya!
so nice! i looike.den got my pumps.oklaa.
dad bought cookies to give to his frens at the office.
as per normal,i will be baking cookies.in the process of baking suji.yumy yum.
haha.mum will be in charge of night shift.hurhur.
purposely baked extra.i want to give it to imran's mummy! heh.=)
i love her.hahahaha.and i must prove Hun wrong.
i can bake.hmph!

i think i am going to school tomorrow.so lazee.boredom strikes.hiakdishh!
love u baby! muacks! haha.

back on track.

2005-10-18T17:15:00.000-07:00

ive got my links and the marquee up.yay! hehe.was tinking of revamping evrytink real soon.
dint go to skul just now.was plain lazy and becoz imran said i shudnt.
haha.yea.right move der.as i woke up,*poop* it becam koko krunch.nahh.pms laa.
haha.sia2 sey bgn sahur.den eat.nvm.i just hope i grew fatter this mth.
like evridae eat morning2 den havent digest slip aredii.
tk gemok pon nasib.haha.
ok.so yar.break fast.my gobstopper.
have i told u i got one aredi from imran?
hehe.thanks sweets.
but.urm.i havent got
1) lasagna
2) ben & jerrys
3) volcom sweater

haha.meany me.i miss you hun.
muacks.muacks.muacks.
u said we'l mit soon.but when??

shud i got to skul tmr or shud i not?
it defeats the purpose man.i heard next week will be strting to study chem again.
why chem?? ishk!

woops.
last friday was out wif hun.
we went town.urm.break fast at PS.
great great time.
saturday went town again wif my parents.shud be shopping.
but i dint get anything.the stuffs just don match my eye.
will be getting raya stuffs wif imran real soon.and im trying to save up for his stuffs too.
i want to buy him sumtink useful that he can use for raya.hehehe.
i cant wait to get my raya outfit this saturday.i think.
this year the whole fam wear same colour.woohoo.nice nice.

i miss imran.
im so glad we'r back on track darl.
i love you.

Life full of uncertainty.

2005-10-17T16:32:00.000-07:00

alhamdulillah.i passed evrything except for maths and chem.
mr tan was dsapointed becoz i dint do well for poa.haha.i passed tho.

Hun,
i love you dearly.im not sure if things will work out between us but i really hope it will. its not that i don trust you.but i don trust me.how far can i go to make sure that our dreams come true? i really am trying to salvage this relationship.and i guess.what i said yesterday make things worst. im really sorry.i knew u wud be wondering why i apologise again and again. guilt is all over me. i guess im not prepared to change for the better.maybe one day.when the time is right. 5 years down the road? perhaps.for now.i just want to be the old me.the iza u fell in love with.i love you because of you.the promises we had will alwaes be true.since we dare to dream,i am sure it wil come true one day.dont you worry abt me.becoz im perfectly fine.i am not forcing myself and ive never felt unhappy being with you.its happiness all year round.i want to be the onli person that can bring happiness into yur life.the onli person who is capable of showering you with all the love i have in me.thats what im talking abt.OUR happiness together.this relationship means alot not only to me but im sure it means alot to you too.memories will never fade. lets rekindle the flame together. kip it going.i love you and i know you love me too.
With Love,
Nurmarriza

when teletubbies meet..

2005-10-13T21:18:00.000-07:00

im all set for the big day tomorrow.
i want to be early tmr.i want to wait for my baby under at bdk tmr.
i don wan him to reach ferst.mebbe i shall gif him a surprise.
and when i see him...
i'l give him a huge teletubby tight..
goshh..i miss him okayy.
a week without imran sucks big time!
stil..kinda dsapointed..
wont be hving the whole day with him.
onli like from afternoon to night.and NOT late night.
i dont think so.hes got class on saturday.
hmm...
shud make the most out of it then..i miss him..
im missing the cuddly cuddle..heh..
been since awhile since hes really really mine..
hes busy lately..night classes..u must be tired..
the conversation we had at night are usually short and sweet..
i dont mind..he needs to rest..pity you..
hell is over for me..partly..EOY has ended..

ive got all stuffs prepared and HANGED..
that means...ive iron my outfit for tomorrow!
yay! i cant wait..i cant wait..

had great time with mimi and syarinah..
SYAMIZA
wth.haha.okayy.it was me who came up wif that.
yikes! heh..nahh..its nothing..
thanks for the artistic super duper prettylicious "art"
love u girls..
haf fun tomorrow babes!
i sure will!

im sorry i dont have the white top u wanted..maybe some other time when ive shopped?
haha.
gotta respect ramadhan and don wear anyting too revealing! heh..
enjOy!

all the best to urbanvibez..=)

female genital mutilation.

2005-10-12T15:11:00.000-07:00

sheesh.this scares me.while waiting for Im to call me ystrday nyte wich he dint bcoz he PURPOSELY fell asleep and i waited like a dumb-dumb,i read a book."No laughter here"
thats the title.its way too cool and kinda scary.

its bout this Nigerian girl who was mutilated.
in Nigeria,there is nothing you can say to justify the savage ritual of mutilating a girl.
female genital mutilation is worst than the normal female circumcision.
undergo the mutilation and ure considered as a "clean" lady when the fact is yur not a normal lady anymore.
u know.a lady w/out raisin.i mean.thats bad.
considering more baby production.wich will never happen.
its gross!
its a practice for Nigerian.
im proud to be a Singaporean.
well,we still have to respect their custom.=)
after the mutilation,u will have to squat on fire to make sure yur raisin is alryte for the first few weeks.after they took te raisin,they sewed the skin together to hide what they did.
my belly flopped while reading it.

reached home and i watch discovery channel.NO NO.was waiting for any rugby match to pop up. haha.u know what baby? i kinda understnd NFL.haha! thru my brother.=)
so, i caught this programme pn discovery channel.
baby-inner adventure.
woahh.i got to know whats happening to the baby in the mummy's womb and hw things developed.how food was transmitted and all.how mums shud go for a therapy.imagine me undergoing that amount of pressure.but,the baby turn out to be very very fine.during the therapy,they let the baby liste to music and true,the waves was transmitted.and when the baby was born,doctors showed different portrait of people so that the baby will be "amazed".i think.

sheeshh.my last paper tmr.im nt really looking forward to it.because the next part of evrything will be receiving the results.and i think i did extremely bad.my dad text me just now.he ask me hws the ppr.i siad easy.he said "sennag2 nnt dpt results parah" i replied and said i did my best and he replied "byk kau nye best"
so does he think im capable of producing a better results? its nt that easy dad.

minniehippo.

2005-10-06T23:23:00.000-07:00

hahah.mimi,i made yur day yesterday? sheesh! ape aku buat? *wonders*
alaa..ckp wonderiza kan..works wonder..
i love u too..i hate toddlers!! sheeshh! fetch ur siblings yest was like leaving me in total darkness with the unknowns..i shall say this..dini audina is so irritating..hahah..i know i know..WE must give in..goshh..ive nvr like giving in to toddlers or mebbe small kids..they are a nuisance! maybe because my parents pamper me last time..hahah..wait..up till now they stil do!

poa 1 was alryte..i hv a lil bit of confidence in it..eng 2 too..i just hope i pass bof pprs..
next up will be f&n and socail studies..
this is killing me..i gez i shud focus on f&n rather than social studies ryte? hahah.
memorizing on the go....

sri told me imran called her and im not aware of that..thats so cool.... shant bear any grudges before it gets worst..wait..its nt exactly sri told me..i was abt to tell sri abt the outing then she said she knew aredi from imran..was pissed..but bleahh... and my baby didnt tell me anything bout the convo they had...awesome..

went to tamp lib with minnie hippo..i gez theres no more weird convos btwn us..and i hope its smooth sailing..=) friends forever sweets....

.mohamad imran bin fadzlan.

2005-10-06T20:34:00.000-07:00

I dont need a RUGBY player
All I need is somebody thats down for me
And he dont have to have money
His love is just like honey
Its so sweet to me
He can have everything in this world
But he'll sacrifice it all for me

And I made up my mind
Im in love this time
And it feels so real

And I..
Know that he wont break my heart
And I..
Know that we wont ever part
Its time, time for us to settle down
And I..
Wanna be with him forever

They can say that I am crazy
For makin him my baby
But that's how it's gone be
See I done been through many changes
But this one I aint changing
It's gon' stay the same

I can have everything in this world
But I'll sacrifice it all for him
And I made up my mind
Im in love this time
And it feels so real

I love you
And all of the things that you do
Oh baby please..
I need you
So believe me
Cause I love you
And every lil thing baby
They don't know how I feel
Cause I know this is real

my one and only.

2005-10-03T08:19:00.000-07:00

THEN...

what a day.a total blast.i hope its settled.i know its not easy for u mimi.
we all can see that.imran and i.we'r gonna be der for you.=)
not forgetting katybedah n bonul.we'r all gonna be der.be true to urself.
thats all im asking from you.
you were the extra reasons why i wanted to go to school.
the smile on yur face brings joy to me.im heppi wen ure heppi.
heartts u babe. aku ade J kau. heh.katybedah thought me that.
never let it affect yur eoy ayte.it shall nvr be the friction.hurhur.
its true what syarinah said just now.gotta be all out.
im proud of you.=)
like you said, who pull me thru the bad times i had last year?
sri utami.
and nows the right time for me to be olwaes der for you.
i can understand if u nid time to be alone.since u wanted it just now.
i guess its alryte.but stil.its no no to kip it to ursef sweets.
if ever the day comes and u nid a shoulder to lean on,im here for you.

NOW...

2005-10-01T14:23:00.000-07:00

accompanied dad to his dinner n dance at hilton hotel.i came out simple.hurhur.the food was nice. especiali the pastries.heard that the pastries are the best among all hotels in singapore. but i so don like the grape wine.the ferst sip was bad.but after gulping most of it i thought it was great.hah.my dad was like "jgn minum bnyk2 nnt pening" realy? wind can make u tipsy? i dint noe dat.the buffet dinner was awesome.so many food so little time.the door gift was alryte. $20 isetan voucher.and i got $50 taka voucher.in all i have $60 taka voucher.$10 was from the previous samsung challenge thingy.the isetan voucher.i guess im gonna get some mango tops. the taka voucher i tink im giving it to mum.got a buffet dinner for 2 at hilton too.mum was asking me if i want it so i can bring sri along.urmm.im not tat sure,maybe after imran's O's i'l bring him. *planning*
was getting stuffs for the d&d at tamp wif sri n mum when i saw aini and faezah.i trembled. hah.
niwae,tankiu darl for accompanying me to tanjong pagar yest.heartts u.u were hot.trust me.
no "liar liar,pants on fire". my pants were not on fire.it was yur pants which was on fire. haha.
*the quiksilver pants* bluek!

*happy childrens day!*

thanks sri for the letter! i LoooOikEeE! muaCks!

2005-09-29T17:23:00.000-07:00

dear someone,
i know you would say im crazy for texting you that way just now.
all i can say and ought to say is
im dangerously in love with you.

dear someone,
i know you would call me crazy when i say "i love you".
please dont.the fact that i love you has olwaes been true.

dear someone,
i know you would call me crazy
for missing you so.
tho we've met yesterday.
please dont.

dear someone,
im happy if you could be happy for me.
can we stay happy?

dear someone,
do u really love me?

2005-09-27T15:06:00.000-07:00

im home early today.it was a boring day.dint study much in school.
was freaking bored.came up with ways and means to make my boo happy.
haha.u like the msg? nobody taught me to do that.i came up wif my own idea.hurhur.
was our 6mthsary ystrdae.dint meet.since we celebrated on saturday.
all tings went well.
sorry cant go dinner with you.blame yur dad.heh.
some other time ayte? shall go fish n co.yum yum.

dear someone,
do u know that i miss u soo much?
and i called my friend imran too?
sheesh,thats bad.
i hope you miss me too.

gotta start mugging later!

gifts exchange.

2005-09-25T16:05:00.000-07:00

made him those cards..hehe..then bought him a candle..nice nice..hah..he likes it..i suppose.. he said he has never come across a girl who goes to this extent..so hmm..and i got a belt!

2005-09-24T22:17:00.000-07:00

a non-tiring day.
towning with imran was superb.too much laughters.
I GOT A ROXY BELT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
okok.im soo happy.finally.a belt of my own.he was like "NO SHARING"
sheesh.okies.its brown colour.nice nice.but...
the volcom tee is nicer..i want..i want..must must buy..
i so don care..this is really A MUST.30+ onli..
agak2 arnd 1 wik da ok ahh..
yess.ermm.a pity i didnt shop at far east just now.
i was tinking of buying shoe and some accessories for raya.then he don wan go up.
LEVEL 1 jerr.
went to surfer girl boutique.so nice.woahh.and cheap2.
after that went heeren to get my belt since i want a new piece.
left with one piece at surfer girl.
super duper happy.was hyper when imran said "nak amik amik ah"
so wonderIZA tau malu and said "tkpela.."
hurhur.
popeye said "nak step malu2 plak..pegi pegi mintak baru nyerr"
ape lagi..rezeki jgn ditolak musuh jgn dicarikk..hurhur..
tup tup tup..
last piece..off to heeren..=)
i love you imran..thank you! muackss!

here comes the day..

2005-09-24T11:50:00.000-07:00

i havent bathe.hurhur.waiting for mimi to come.
and then get myself ready for the big day.
been a week since i met him.
and today.i shall be sent to heaven.heh.
celebrating our 6mthsary today.
towning.
made sumtink for him.its abit kiddy.heh.
its ARTISTIC.
i love you.
i cant wait!!

happy burfday mum.
hope you like the renoma purse.

mimi.fudgey.wonderiza.

2005-09-20T21:24:00.000-07:00

replaced anah for the science centre trip just now.
thought it will be alot alot of fun.
hah.it was so boring but sumting cheered me up in the end.
F-O-O-D
the story goes...
our school was late.we reached science centre and the talk already begins.
but we dint lose anything.the talk was crappy shit.
about statistics.wtf.statistics experts?? haha.
furstly,it was abit embarassing to actually reach late since all eyes were on us.
den,our school dint win any award for the competition.
there was this maths competition.my school participated.but we lose.
so just now we somehow attended the prize giving thingy.
other schools that won onli brought the winners to the science centre but my school bought a whole lot of students for god knows why.mcm belen2 gitu ah.haha.
fudgey,mimi and i.we named this particular prof "the bean".hes really cute.mr bean's twin.heh.
then,after the damn talk,the prof said we can help ourselves to the food outside.
the embarassing part was...
mimimok was so elated that she somehow said "yay!" infront of evryone.and the prof was like going "urmm..yar...ther will be food.."
haha.EMBARASSING MOMENT.all eyes was on sri.haha.
okay.so we helped ourselves to the food.came out of the auditorium and rush for the free drinks.
then asked the MR PHOTOGRAPHER to take a picture of us.
and we dont know who the hell the fotographer is.hah.
took lotsa food.and we form a meal ring.and sat on the floor to eat.mcm tk senonoh gitu.
done for the ferst round.fudgey,mimi and i.went for anader 2nd round.
we finish up the yummy choc muffin that was serve on the tray.
pity those queueing behind for the foods.its GONE.
after the trip we wnt to tamp inter.survey survey stuffs.it was great going out wif them.
heh.well,we'r on good terms at least.=)

PMS=CRAMPS

2005-09-19T17:41:00.000-07:00

bad bad day.
sorry mok.cant accompany you.some other day k?
maybe wednesday after mine maths class yar?
i hope u had a great visit at the parliament just now.

had to break fast due to sudden pms.
wasnt expecting pms to be so soon.
thanks iylia! heh.

PMS=CRAMPS
i hate this.shitty bang bang.
cant walk.had to sit all the time.
manage to stay till the end of the day.
after the freaking geog class.
asked imran to fetch me since i wasnt filing well.
i was feeling very bad.last resort.imran.
come to think bout it.its time that i shudnt disturb him.
so yeaa.went home alone.walk out with fudgey and then met ayumi.

maths lesson was so boring.*back to square one*
had to do revision on our own.no more teachings.its all algebra-based revision.
it was hell for me.obviously because ive forgotten those shits.
in like an hour time,i could onli finished up 7 qns.woahh.congrats.
was really really struggling.

gotta rest.watch teevee.and then start studying.

i guess its never too late..

2005-09-18T15:22:00.000-07:00

to start off with..
i had a FAN-ta-bu-LOUS day.

today shall be the last day im having fun.after that.no more no more.
intensive studying starts tomorrow.ryte mimi? yess.will be spending most of my time wif mimi studying.i hope.
no early nights for me.
susa susa dahulu..senang senang kemudian..
undergoing a hard life..haha..

if intensive studying never starts tomorrow..
slap slap mysef! diciplinary actions from imran would be better.hah!

must-must study.
be bold.be disciplined.heh.

be proactive.be confident.=)

2005-09-17T21:33:00.000-07:00

guess what? my baby bought me this..taadaa! hurhurhur.. *whatever*

dint go jb just now.massive massive jam.headed to jurong point.banquet.busy busy week.i miss imran. *drools* heh.

(jam tu jgn mcm paham ah.hurhur)

2005-09-15T21:22:00.000-07:00

i am discouraged.

hellow.yellow.wellow.
i love you.
you love me.
we are happy family.

happy i got you.=)

im missing you cause im not kissing you.

2005-09-15T15:33:00.000-07:00

i miss imran.real bad.
i cant focus.i feel like as if my days with him are numbered.
its true.hes too good to be mine.
sometimes,it feels like as if i dont deserve to be his.
im standing strong stil.
i cant bear to live him.hes the only ONE.
and will alwaes be the ONE.
i love you.
i want us to live the dreams we had imran.
relive this relationship.
i want it to be like the usual imran-iza.
its time to reminisce bout the past and be the usual us.
we had so much fun and laughter altogether.
things are so different now.
do u realize it?
i hope you do.i want dose moments to be back here with us.
i treasure you.i hope you do.
i love you and i hope u do love me too.

we made it...

2005-09-14T21:05:00.000-07:00

met boo.hes so boncitz.woops.i mean hes so cute! hah.wanted to hug hin tight when met him just now.cant.hah.mimi was der.onli got a hug wen we said goodbye.sheesh!
met him for the last time in the week.im missing him already.all the best for yur prelims sweets.
high hopes for my baby!

we must make this happen imran.alryte? life would be purposeless without you.
love you sweets.

the conversation we had yesterday made a difference.im afraid things might change but i guess i shud trust you.be more confident in you.im sorry.i've done wrong again.and ure never sick and tired of the same old me.i don want things to end here.not because its already 6 months or for whatever reasons but because i still love you.i simply love being pampered.heh.the bond between us is too strong.throw in any methods to seperate us.it wont work peeps.

im glad he put so much hope on us.i think hes too good to be mine.stil,i want to be too good to be his.heh.sorry for my temperamental character.i know it sucks and thats the killer.i need ur tolerance.im trying my best to change.and im sorry if i havent been understanding.but freedom. its all yurs.ure not deprived of freedom arent you? it works well for us on that basis. communication wise.its alryte.maybe u should change the way u talk to me.u know what i mean baby.like you said.nobody's perfect.im not too.we arent perfectionist.

i can see the effort.trying to make things happen between us.and you've proven me that u do treasure me.not many ammendments should be made between us.=) i love you imran!

Mohamad Imran=Nurmarriza

2005-09-13T22:31:00.000-07:00

it just gotta be that way.it just got so complicated as days passed.

*love leads to laughter,love leads to pain*
*with you by my side i feel good times again*
*never have i felt this feelings before*
*u showed me the world how could i ask for more*
*and i know although times can be hard*
*we'l make it through*
*im forever in love with you*

imran,u have never spoilt my day.uve alwaes make my day.but even if we quarrel,its alwaes in the middle of the day and u'l make it up for it when night comes.when tings are okay,bof of us will head to LaLa Land.
mimimOk says that we'r turning out this way because we cudnt spent most of our time together like we used to.
i don disagree totally.only to a small extent.
i think theres more than just us drifting apart due to tight schedules.

we'v yet compromise the teeny-weeny things.
u must be sick of me for alwaes being in the win-win position.
and im alwaes mad at you over some foolish stuffs.

i want to talk to you and make you understand.but sometimes it dawns on me that i shud let you know *me* ursef.i reali want to make this clear
what u had wif aini isnt what ure gonna get from me.i want this ting between us be a special one.
u may repeat the same mistakes u did when u were with aini,i so dont mind. because i wanna know u my own way. u get what i mean dear?

still.i know.we'r gonna stay as strong.
*trust* you that ur love for me has never changed.
*trust* me that my love for you has never changed.

2005-09-13T18:25:00.000-07:00

i guess its just my fault.and things go the wrong way for us.6 months imran.6 months.....

2005-09-10T21:36:00.000-07:00

missing him.
been awhile since we talk.
im busy today.
hes busy tmr.
stil,evry nyte we do tok on the fone.
but not for long.
i wil usuali turn in early while he gotta study.
*i stil tink hes the one and wil alwaes be the one*

imran-iza day out

2005-09-08T22:26:00.000-07:00

meet IMRAN just now.hurhur.im so happy.spose to meet at 11.tapi janji melayu.niwae hes tired.he nids some sleep.so yeaa.he woke up late.i wasnt mad.hah.i mean i shudnt.headed to ijah's hse to get the mat.then meet IMRAN in bus 67.was elated.got the hug ive been longing for.aww.i love you.
off we go to ecp.had bfast der.erm.brunch i shall say.had no appetite so juz share our normal laksa.then off to our normal place at ecp.settled down.decided not to sat on the mat for whatever reasons.haha.(he decided so) sat on the bench.which we bof cant reach.gosh.we'r shortys.
i thought we wudnt study actualli.but eventually we did.i did focus la.he taught me the new maths topic.i understood.im glad he dint raise his voice like he olwaes does wen he teaches me maths.then did my maths hwk.after 2 hrs,we decided to leave the place.and go food-hunting.
reached the makan place at ecp.bof donchnoe wat to eat.we ordered carrot cake finally.share. surprisingly,we were bof full.then we took a cab and headed home.
*it was never easy to say goodbye*
it was a great day.i love him.we seldom spent most of our time together.i guess its okay if i wont be miting you next week dear.except on monday where i have to get the printed stuffs from you.u must be busy studying.ure prelims are next week.all the best to you.
my darl is not a quitter.i love u sweets.tankiu for making my day.

2005-09-07T13:52:00.000-07:00

im so fucked up wif evryone.
my dad asked me to go my aunt hse todae to take care of my granny.
i agreed.reluctantly.
i mean.i was sick too.
and i have skool early today and will be having tuition ltr.
was on the way home and bro called.he asked me to rush there since he nids to go to skul.
i rushed home and change.
was about to go out,i called dad told him im goin out.
he said "its ok if u don wanna go"
wtf.
i called bro and told him im not going.
he said i shud pity my lonely granny.
ok then i decided to go.
mum was sleeping.i dint noe if im spose to wake her up and tell her that im goin out.i did.and she scolded me.she said i don have to go.she shouted at me.i told her my bro asked me to go.and my dad said so too.so i donno wich to listen.i tot i shud go.i pity my granny to la actuali.then she asked me to tok to my dad again.and asked me to tell my dad that i don want to go.wth.ok fine.i listen to her.told my dad im not sure whether to go or not.then my dad scolded me and in the end just said "foget it.no need to go" he put down the fone.obviously hes mat wif me.arghh.what a world.
i am so not feeling well.but i raelly nid to go tuition.i nid to learn the new maths chapter before school starts or i will be lagging behind.hah.im off to bed i guess.

Lazy me...

2005-09-05T15:06:00.000-07:00

woke up at 750 and get changed to go to the doctor.
dad sent me.
the place opens at 830.
but the doctor came late.
at 9.stoopid.
2nd patient.
doctor can ask me what medicine i want instead of just giving it to me.hah.
$24 gone.
reach home at 930.
had prata for bfast.
ate my medicine.
at 1030 i shut my eyes to a faraway land.
woke up at 1240 bcoz my dad called me.
shitty bang bang.
i cant sleep.
called boo.
he asked me to sleep.
honestly,listening to ur voie makes me sleep.hah.
sleep-sleep-sleep.
and here i am blogging.
right after i woke up.
havent had lunch.
my stomach's grumbling.
will be having lunch and then im off to another dream land!

2005-09-04T23:08:00.000-07:00

i miss him!!!

*i miss the "i need you and i love you" hug from him!*

so.....they say we are cute couples....

lets just be who we are...

never pretending....

the laughters uve seen frm ur eyes are true...

dose were the happy moments imran and i share...

2005-09-04T20:27:00.000-07:00

im so sick.
difficulties breathing.
difficulties eating.
i have to force down the food and it hurtts.*yikes!*
the boat trip was alryte.
i miss imran.
called him onli to be disappointed even further.
i shudnt be mad tho.
it was just a teeny-weeny matter.
lets not blow it up.
im stil tinking of a new url for my blog.
what shud i put?

happy belated burfday syafiee.
happy belated burfday nurul 'ain.

2005-09-01T20:30:00.000-07:00

I will never find another lover
sweeter than you, sweeter than you
I will never find another lover
more precious than you, more precious than you
Boy you are
Close to me you're like my mother,
Close to me you're like my father,
Close to me you're like my sister,
Close to me you're like my brother
You are the only one my everything
and for you this song I sing

All my life I prayed for someone like you
I thank God that I, that I finally found you
All my life I prayed for someone like you
I hope that you feel the same way too
Yes, I pray that you do love me too

Said I promised to never fall in love with a stranger,
You're all I'm thinking of
I praise the God above,
For sending me your love, I cherish every hug,
i really love you.

You're all that I've ever known,
When you smile on your face all I see is a glow,
You turned my life around,
You picked me up when I was down,
You're all that I've ever known,
when you smile your face glows,
You picked me up when I was down
You're all that I've ever known,
when you smile your face glows,
You picked me up when I was down and
I hope that you feel the same way too,
Yes I pray that you do love me too

2005-09-01T11:27:00.000-07:00

rise and shine imran! hah.he just got up while i woke up at 10.hmph! i got mcd.u dont! bluek!
i miss u! *Grins*

happy teacher's day to all!

yesterday's celebration was alryte.it was happenning! especiali when mr saiful and mr ghazali played on drums and sang.i looike! and this particular band consisting of i donno who.but they were great.i tink its the matnur band.they performed for all celebrations and yesterday's wasnt an exception.i like their edition of "growing old wif u".nice nice.i was "drooling" wen i heard qas sang yesterday.hes got a great voice.and cute dimples.kekekeke.performance by breathgrabbers was alryte too.they were not that energetic but their costume really was an eye catching one.
took pics wif sizlupp in skul and later wen we had a day out.hah.been a long time since we gathered.we were supposed to be sitting down and recall what really happened to us for the past few mths.but we didnt.instead it was a day out.window shopped and our tradition.taking pix.woohoo.hah.smpai kene mara ngn security.kekeke.
here are the pics.

2005-08-29T16:41:00.000-07:00

dear diary,
i only have u to turn my back on.i juz text imran.i do not wished to tok to him.neither do i want to talk to sri,huda or ijah.not now.i nid some time to be alone.i really hope u wil understand.don be mad at me.

dear diary,
i dont know where i go wrong.what the hell i did to hurt everyone.can i live alone in this world? will i survive? will i be able to live my dreams? does dreams really come true?

dear diary,
what is friends? are they really that important? i have one whom i call my best friend.sri utami.shes been wif me for like a few months.yes.its only afew months.my life revolved around him last time.he left me and i was all alone.sri came to me.i trusted her alot. and i still am.thru her,i knew adzhani.and i was closer to didil.sri,adz and i.we had fun times together but we didnt had any sad times togeder.we were onli close for awhile.i thought it was just another rebound.i dont know what happen.people accused me of doing something real bad.like i took sri away from her.gosh,i didnt do that.i faced those times with much determination.

dear diary,
i was closer to huda and ijah.that was the time when sri started to get closer to them too.things went on smoothly.i missed those times.we had many girls day out.we celebrated valentine's day,sri's burfday,ijah's burfday.thru huda,i met my baby.imran.260305.there was another girls day out for us.and that nite,imran and i were already carelessly romanticly in love. that was the best part of my year 2005.having bOnuL,kAtybEdAh,miMimOk and my pOpeyE all to myself.then,sri won 2nd for the talentime competition.we were all happy for her.huda left us for australia.she cudnt join in the fun.but later,we kept each other updated.and we were still as cloze.

dear diary,
teacher's day performance is gonna be real soon.mimi's performing.before this,huda and ijah were supposed to be performing wif amsyar but it all went topsy turvy.sri was tensed up when bof of them were comitted to amsyar's team.i wasnt in the picture.i care less bout whats happening.

dear diary,
we were all far apart.even sri had lesser time wif me.i understand.ijah wanted to have another sizlupp outing.i know i cant make it.by then,my mum didnt allow me to go out with my friends anymore.it was even difficult for me to meet imran.then,leser time with imran.up till now,frevasizztarnized bloggie has never been updated.its a place for people to dissed us.

dear diary,
i received a letter from ijah.she meant good.but at the same time,i was disappointed.i was confused.wher does my mistake lies? i am only being me.ive never tried to change my own self.my parents pamper me with evryting.from top to toe.i say it and i get it.imran pamper me wif kiddie stuffs like im one hell of a baby.i really dont mind.
winnie the pooh.mickey.minnie.popeye.olive.powerpuff girls.
roxy.ripcurl.reef.esprit.mango.topshop.
im happy im born wif these luxuries.but why am i accused of not being my ownself?
i want to live my life my own way.why must i think of what people are gonna say? why must i make other people happy while i am not feeling happy? i dont want it to happen.really.

dear diary,
i am not afraid of losing sri utami bte saiful bakhri.i am prepared.one day,it shall happen.i know it.i hope its not too soon.i dont bear any grudges against adz.i want to be there for her too.it takes time sweetie for us to really compromise.i thought everything was ok wif us.i can mingle arnd wif you.i thought u were feeling that way too.i was mistaken.u were uncomfortable with me.i can understand that.im one hell of a noisy bitch.i mingle around with everybody.even if shes not cloz to me.i dont chus friends.whoever talks to me is my friend.whether or not she has the same liking as me is another thing.i cant possibly forced her into doing sumthing she hates but i like.

dear diary,
today.im not talking to anyone.only you.look,how special you are to me.i want to apologise to everyone.if u happen to be reading this,i may have done something real bad to you.i am hereby apologising to you.
i hope things will turn out just fine each day.each day awaits a brand new surprise for me.

dear diary,
i want to make things happen.but i cant bring myself to do so.therefore,i shall not solve this problem in any situation.i will juz move wit the flow and see what tomorrow has instore for me.

dear diary,
to end it off.i love everyone.i treasure every moment i had with you.today,i may turnout to be just a normal someone to you.and not a special someone.thank you for bringing much joy into my life.
i love you mohamad imran bin fadzlan.
i love you sri utami bte saiful bakhri.
i love you siti khadijah bte siron.
i love you nurul huda bte juahil.
i love you nuradzhani bte abdul jalil.
*thers no easy way to say goodbye*

2005-08-28T13:33:00.000-07:00

had soo much fun yesterday! finally went to malia's bday party.ciann dier.she was pretty ystrday! baju bli kt bombay ehk? haha.she was surprised when i came."marriza kakak2 seyy!"
maner tak.ive got lotsa stufs to bring.grab mummy's handbag.gi mampos.jln jer mcm minah tkde cara.haha.wOoPs! after the party,fetched imran from tanah merah mrt.too eager to meet hym.was at the left platform.and he was at the right platform.have to wait for the middle train platform to rich den can cross over.as i reached,i hugged him tightly.haha.miss him soo much. he was surprised.tk pena2 peluk kuat2.hehex.den mit sri,adz,nul at tamp mcd.take pictures.fulfiling mimi's wish.headed home wif imran.we had such a great time together.i love u bebs! to my honeybunny sweetiepie baby,i love u too! hehe.*winks*

2005-08-27T11:32:00.000-07:00

alone at home.muahahaha.my parents went to jb wif my brother.lets pray my bro wil get his volcom belt.haha.*prays*
malia's burfday.HAPPY BURFDAY SWEETIE!
Nor Iqmalia Shaharudin.
shes my bestie since primary school.probably knew her since primary 1 but werent in the same class.but the best thing was.everytime we passed by each other,we'd quarrel.haha.and we donno each others name that time.i tinkk maybe we hated each other from primary 1 til primary4 was because of sumtink wich ive yet found out.muahaha.its abit complicated how we embarked on this friendship.*winks*
PRIMARY 5.
were in the same class.wif her and the rest.
Amirah,Nurlina,Suhailah,Erin,Nazrina,Iqmalia and me.
we were that Famous last time.
maybe because of the talent time thingy.haha.
yea.we were in the talentime.and we came 2nd.it wasnt that bad.we had many supporters.muahahaha.dose times were the best i shall say.
PRIMARY 6.
still in the same class.studied together most of the time.wen psle was near.planned wich skul we'd all wanna go.tinking that we mite end up in the same school.high hopes then.aft psle,we painted our school's new science lab.it was really nice.we did it all by ourselves.till now,the painting stil remains.then,graduation nite.we were all princessinators.haha.all dressed up prettily.that nyte,i received a burfday present from malia.i loike! and its still in my drawer.its a blue beads necklace.complete set wif a pair of ear rings.its really nice.i kip it till now! even the diary u wrote on,i still have it.i love those tyms sweetz! after the psle results was out,we found out we werent in the same school.that was bad.
SECONDARY 1.
we were still close in the beginning.but later was too busy to kip each oder updated.tho we'r apart,we knew we needed each other.for whenever we met at the interchnge,her smile do made my day.=) up till now,we are best of friends.
happy burfday malia.live ur dreams.muax!

tHats uS in sEc oNe!

Iza.Naz.Malia.

nurlina.suhailah.erin.iza.malia.naz.wif our grad certs.

RayEr 2004

su.naz.iza.malia.lina.

.charmed ones.

.in.the.bus.

.naz and me.

thats us!

"friends are the bacon bits in a salad bowl of life"
-mencius

2005-08-25T16:38:00.000-07:00

got back my maths common test paper.flunked it.my teacher said i did improved.wth.i wanst at all satisfied.

tomoro's our 5mthsary.
baby,don ged me anytink MICKEY.or whatever thats related to disney inc.ya noe.i odn want to be blamed for having no "identity of my own" and later start a fight.i love you.muax!

kol me sooN!

2005-08-24T20:04:00.000-07:00

the day was FANTABULOUS.yipee!
its never over between us sweetz.

that nyte shall not repeat.
we'l try ayte.
guilt is still all over me.im reali reali sorry.

treated boo to pizza hut!
haha.he wasnt all all surprise.expected that too happen.
his facial expression remains the same even when i gave him a surprise.
ape ckp.
pizza and baked rice.woahh.
he chose my favourite pizza toppings.hahaha.smart seyy dierr.
this is CHEMISTRY.
then headed home.

it was a short day yet a meaningful one for us.

wait.wait.its gonna be our 5mthsary this friday.
the treat juz now was part of yur present dear.
the 2nd part of it has yet to come.
like i said boo,theres more to come between us.

yipEe!

2005-08-22T15:32:00.000-07:00

yay! saw my new skin? hehex.i did it!

dint attend skul.bad bad pms cramps.yikes!
stil be goin for tuition ltr at 430.i havent get ready yet.

i miss my baby.
i fil like pinching his chubby cheeks.
i miss the cuddle i always get from him.*grins*
he must have grown fatter by now.yippee! *winks*
more to come,imran!

2005-08-21T17:33:00.000-07:00

*2heartsbeatsas1*

its ok boo.don say sorriie.
we havent spent much time together.the last tyme we met was last wednesday.onli for awhile.
like u said,we shud take tings slow.
i am trying to take it real slow.we nid more time to be alone at times.
i can understand that.
i am busy wif common tests and ure busy preparing for ur O's.
your O's is a big event for US.it concerns OUR future.thats what u said too.
this determine where you will go and what u will be in future.
trust me.i will owaez be there for you.
we made a deal that we would only meet oncein a week.its totally fine wif me.
i envy my cuzin and my frens who can see her loved one each day in school.
but stil,that doesnt mean i regret being wif you
we got a lifetime to be together.
for as long as WE lived,will always stay together.
our 5mthsary is near.its this friday.we don have to celebrate it like we used to.
i say this not because i am mad or i am giving you up.
but i know we cant afford to be together on that day.

the calls that i received from you every morning and every nyte is more than enuff to heal those pain i had when i missed you.
im happy as long as ure happy.
and im enjoying every moment i had being wif you.

2005-08-21T16:23:00.000-07:00

I wanna make you smile whenever you're sad
Carry you around when your arthritis is bad
All I wanna do is grow old with you

I'll get your medicine when your tummy aches
Build you a fire if the furnace breaks
Oh it could be so nice, growing old with you

I'll miss you
Kiss you
Give you my coat when you are cold

Need you
Feed you
Even let ya hold the remote control

So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink
Put you to bed if you've had too much to drink
I could be the lady who grows old with you
I wanna grow old with you

predict me.

2005-08-18T17:03:00.000-07:00

how much confidence do i have? hmm. my confidence will fluctuate and change subtly from day to day, hah whatever happens to me daily will help me to build up the confidence in myself. *i hope so.
my maths common test juz now was OK.i am abit dsapointed.i cant solve the equation and subsequently,i cant complete the graph.my trigo.urmm.im not sure if i get it right.the whole class got different ans each.i fil so stupid if i fail this bloody paper.aniwae,i realy am that STUPID.
got back POA test paper.i got full marks for the furst bank reconciliation.but the 2nd one a mark was deducted bcoz of my carelessness.im so weak in MCQ.i got like 4/20 for it.haha.still.overall,i passed my POA.i got a B4.31/50.im kinda happy.and my mum said 31/50 was nuthing.and its juz a class test so its a NO BIG DEAL.gosh.times have change mum.please understand.primary school life you can assume that class tests is nuthing.but helo? im in sec 3 ok.and like class tests is considered as 50% of my CA marks.donch u tinkk dats alot.i told her the social studies paper hat i took aft skul is gonna be difficult(i called her during skul time) .and she answered "LEISURELY"."tk blaja camner nk pass".kk.wtf.i asked her to ask my dad if i studied yest nyte or not.shes not at home.so,she dont know what the hell i am doing at home.and shes accusing me blindly.ive changed mum.please realize that.ive made it a habit to study each nyte even when im tired.and each nyte,ure working.hah.WHATEVER.

im trying so hard to please evryone but i cant.

Following that misunderstandings we had, it is easy to forgive and forget. However, acts of ignorance and stupidity shouldnt have happened in the first place.An honest mistake happens to everyone, a mistake that really is unavoidable; and whether the effect lasted a life time, or a day, while never forgotten, should be forgiven.
there was a slight change juz now.we finally had a real talk early in the morning.im glad. there wont be any girl's day out.maybe not so soon.all too busy.dem wif their performances.and me wif my unpredictable freaky life.babes wif O's.we barely had time for each other.stil,deep in me. they remain to be my true friends.thru ups and downs.i will still call them my besties.

hmmm. fate.??? fate is not a matter of chance but always a matter of choice. and we've choosen to be friends. And no matter how difficult it is for you guys to accept this, no matter how much pain all of us are in, We must learn to face each other with a smile for we know deep within, that we wil alwaez remain as bestfriends and we loved each other. still now. but not as much. it is a cold truth to accept yet a hot pursuit.

2005-08-16T15:37:00.000-07:00

my omelette turned into scrambled eggs!! wakakaka.i ALMOST screwed it up.stil.tings turn out well.on top of that.i got my cooks badge.haha.
yul's bday today.fatimah's bday yesterday.happy bday y'all.

*he* called.not miting.

MINE!

*US*

*JAP'S STYLE.PRAWN TEMPURA.VANESSA'S

2005-08-15T04:42:00.000-07:00

met boo yesterday.im so glad we met finali.after 6days.and....we watched the fireworks display at esplanade..it was spectacular.
towards the end of our nyte yesterday.i felt so low.and guilty.after the fireworks display,we had nowher to go.and nuthing came across my mind.i dint noe wher to go too.so yar.suggested goin home.wif an empty stomach.hmph! silence overcome us.haha.all the way from esplanade to marina square and den to the mrt station.we went all quiet.it wasnt us.for 5 mths,ive owaez been the noisy one.and he will go on smiling.whether or not its sincere,i dono.haha.its not,wen hes angry or tired.but it is,wen hes happy.bla bla bla.
den the beginning of the goodbye part was sucky.i cried.gosh.i felt so guilty for not making his day.and i was really afraid of letting him go.not till.he said sumtink sweet to me.was then i stopped crying.the tears "ceremony" lasted for 10 mins? i hope he noes why i cried.the thought of leaving hym for the nyte was "unbearable".what more saying goodbye for a lifetime.i hope that wont happen.like what he whispered to me yest nyte."FAITH".da mcm school motto seyy."FAITH,HOPE AND CHARITY" haha.

ive got good news!! sine and cosine rule will not be tested for common tests.i was so happy. i hope the papers will turn out the way i want it to.haha.and i really nid to get A2 or at least B3. not because i want to be treated to swensens or wherever he wans to bring me.but because i want to prove to my parents that i can do it.and that i deserve a better life.and i want to prove myself wrong.ive been telling myself dat i cant pass maths no matter how hard i study.now...i did pass.JUST PASSED.is more than enuf PREVIOUSLY.but not for common tests.like what boo said.if u aim A2,u might fall back on B3..so don aim C6 or u might end up getting D7.prof imran punye idea.hahaha.i love you dear.i wont ask u anymore qn if i donno hopw to do it.nnt ade jer kene mara.hmph! serik!

f&n prac exam tmr.lets hope tings will go real smooth.no chowtar.haha.

2005-08-14T14:17:00.000-07:00

please...please...i wanna watch the fireworks................

2005-08-12T20:59:00.000-07:00

6 days.apart from him.i fil shytty all over.*shytty bang bang*HOLY shyte*hahaha
social studies and maths common test coming up.180805
for now,im so hepi.i got C5 for maths.

asked enli bout the hospilaty course that im interested in.
to my "horror".
i nid to have at least 4A1 to be able to take up that course.
lets see.4A1.ermmm.
Malay? f&n? poa? english?
is that all? hmmm.i donno.

imran is dOubLe-OK! yay! miting him this sunday.
if my parents allow,i wud want to catch the last firework display.

was at marina south carnival yesterday.it was super-duper-licious.=))

i read up about jesus christ.and i find it really weird.i don understand.
*deceptions in lies*
that was how the HOLY shyte came about.

this month's hp bill is:$47
but..but..but..
outstanding amount is $129.
what the hell.
my dad dint pay.ishk! tk lamer lagi no more outgoing calls.ishk!!!!
its not my fault aniwae.hehe.(i'L heLp out once i have the money)(and its not for REAL)

2005-08-10T15:32:00.000-07:00

i feel so sickly too.haha.
i juz wished i cud be sick like imran.*grins*

had a great time yesterday wif my family.
we had dinner at permas jaya.
S-E-A-F-O-O-D
yummy!
prawn tempura is so nice yet so cheap.woahh.
before that we went to this mall.
and we entered the levi's boutique.
i like this faded jeans and i showed it to my parents.
until....
my dad ask me if i want it.of course i want it.=))
but.i dint bought it.mummy say i shud get it sumoder tyme.
after putting much thought,ive bought alot of stuffs lately so i tinkk they shud save it.
but if really my mum say i can buy it,im so gonna be elated.

sayang,don tink i owaez get what i want that easily ok.my parents usuali buys me the stuff i want because they want me to be happy and they want me to be really nice to them.haha.. its so obvious.but of course,i do appreciate it.see,i study so hard till i improved.ure happy for me.but i don tink my parents are satisfied.it hurts me deep down when they still tinks im a failure and im a pain in the ass.i really wished i could please them.and my mum stil disagrees wen i said i wanna get involved in tarian.to add it on.even my dad is supporting my mum.alaa.step my mum dulu dengar je sume kata2 my nenek.i dono la.i don wan tinks to get any worst.i wil kip it all my filings to myself and not share it wif my parents anymore.since obviously they dont understand what i mean wen i say anyting.its POINTLESS.i jz have to respect them blindly and please them in a way wher they are gonna be pleased.[when im not]

*we earn the respect and not demand for it*

i don tinkk they came across dat statement before.and if i were to explain it to them.they wudnt care less.

forget it.fatimah,is there sumting uve been keeping from me? bout ur problems.halo halo. im here for u ayte sweetie.sumones turning 15 soon! i doubt we'l have the tyme to celebrate ur burfday so soon.ive got lotsa tings to do.im sorie yar? i hope ur burfdae celebrations wif ur frens and ur dear faz wil be a special one.do kip me updated ok?

can any kind-hearted soul out der motivates me to study NOW?
i know.i know.LONGEST YARD shall be my best companion for now.im gonna watch that movie while studying.my damn tutor gave me alot of homework.ishk! even my teachers in school dint give a single homework.leceh ar.my mum's nasi ayam wil be my "caffeine" to let me stay awake the whole afternoon.yay! i love the oily,oily fried chicken.imran,u must be drooling.*bluek*

2005-08-10T14:36:00.000-07:00

Everybody wants a little piece of my time
But still i put you at the end of the line
How it breaks my heart to cause you this pain
To see the tears you cry fallin' like rain

Give me the chance to prove
And i'll make it up to you
I still believe in you
With a love that will always be

Standing so strong and true
Baby i still believe in you and me
Somewhere along the way, i guess i just lost track
Only thinkin' of myself never lookin' back
For all the times i've hurt you, i apologize
I'm sorry it took so long to finally realize
Give me the chance to prove
That nothing's worth losing you
I still believe in you

*mEnGapA hArUs ciNta perLu adA yAng bErpisAh?*

2005-08-09T14:15:00.000-07:00

happy 40th birthday singapore! *patriotic*
imran's running a temperature.fever and a bad flu.do take care yar.i miss u.*grins*
i watched GREASE yesterday.woah.its onli the ferst disc tho.bcoz i wanted to watch america's next top model.they were bitchy mann.i LoOoiKe.haha.
i don tinkk i wil be able to watch the fireworks again.*sighs*
my dad plans to go jb and have our dinner there.its ok tho.bcoz im gonna have seafood there. *smiles*

2005-08-08T17:05:00.000-07:00

sAtUrdAy

dint attend yul's bday party.sowie babe,cudnt be wif u.went to the hospital wif my fam.visit my aunty.yeaa.nenek say i grew fat.she kept saying it evrytym we met.haha.while mak long was asking my mum "biler anak kau nk besa2 nie?" haha.my mum told her nenek say i grew fat aredi.mak long say gemok skit jerr.dgr tuu imran.skit jerr.den my mum say.she don tinkk i wil grow anymore.den start la die bbl sal my dad's genes n her genes.ape ckp.had dinner at banquet den.sposed to view the fireworks display but dint.it was too late.

sUndAy

anader day out wif imran.met hym at bdk inter den headed to sri's crib to get my studs.haha.imran kene kacau. bluek! "kau tanak singgah rumah aini jap?" hahahaha. "tkya sudah! buang masa aku jerr." hahahaha.den took 65 and headed to plaza singapura. imran had his lunch.tapi kalau nk ikot plan,we were spose to go for lunch together at east coast.we dint bcoz i was too full.den we went to paragon to get my roxy hairband.mummy gave me money go buy.happy nyerr.imran say we shud check out at heeren if i wan the pink and white instead of black and whyte.i told him takder but he insists.and we nade a deal.if kat heeren ade,i wil treat hym but if tkder,he will have to treat me.and..der wasnt any roxyband at all.hahaha.too bad. he dint treat me stil.hmph! den we went to far east and i exchanged my mickey studs.now,i have the pink one! yay! aft dat we went to esplanade.we thought it was still early so we went to the library.den to the esplanade's roof.ye ye nk tgk fireworks tpi tkder! this is the 2nd tym in a row i cudnt get to view the fireworks.i MUST view it tomoro.i MUST.was at city hall mrt busy taking pictures.haha.and den saw cikgu ervina in the mrt.she saw imran.she asked me "da brape lamer awak ngan dier?" i told her da 5 mths.den she ask "happy?" even before i cud answer her she said "sayer tgk awak happy jer ngn dier.bgos bgos.happy couples."hehe.i had so much fun being wif him.*winks*

tOdAY

sing2 community song in skul.wee!~ pple tink im crazee but i don tinkk so.the songs composed for us to sing.as long as i enjoy myself im okay.hehe.recalled the old tymes in primary skul.i was the flag barrier in skul.woah.im so proud.hows my new skin? style kan.hehehe. i love it. its so unique.ijat was like asking me for the codes.told hym i wudnt wanna give it to hym.he told me he learnt it before kat poly but he forget hw to use it.i told hym.denn i shud be the one graduating from poly and not hym.hahaha.oik.bagi balik CD aku cepat2 tau!

the next tyme im miting my boo wil be next wik.we cant spent lotsa tyme togeder anymore.we'r too busy.i ges its fine wif me.as long as he kips me updated bout his stuffs den i shud be ok.i trust his whereabouts.and that i wil never be betrayed.=) i love you.

2005-08-05T20:40:00.000-07:00

a bad week.lotsa tings bugging me.i tot i cud rely on them.and i tot they trusted me so much. they DONT.they are putting me in a spot.

2005-08-04T22:04:00.000-07:00

what a game.a game im playing.and a game a gerl played on me.
how dumb can i ged? i knew i shudnt be affected.but stil its bugging me for it involves not onli me but the pple around me.

2005-08-01T15:43:00.000-07:00

i thought i shud blog.i was on my way back home.at the bstp opposite aquarius.i sat beside this lady wich was an ex damaian.used to be a leader of mine during camp.den,a guy came and sat beside her.he was staring at us.but most of the tyme at that lady.he was trying his best to please us.like combing his hair and stuffs.den,he sat nearer to the lady and purposely touch the lady's thigh.i was surprised.the lady was cool.she dint shout.she left the seat and stand up.denn...
the guy move his bloody ass and sat beside me.i was praying he wudnt do it AGAIN.owel,he did. the most fucked up ting was.der was oni the 3 of us at the bstp.he dint touch my thigh but he held my hands wich was on top of my thigh.sumtink liddat la..omg.i stand up and give a tight slap. honestly,i cant imagine myself doin dat.hahaha.he held my hands and yea i was struggling. the lady helped me.the lady pushed him away.he was abit too strong so the bof of us shouted "molester!" hahahaha.den he ran.wth.aft so much ting happened,the bus dint arrive.like fuck sakk.hm.der goes my story for today.it my ferst tym.and i stil cant believe i did that.

okok.now.my maths test.i did OK.satisfactory.no a1.i hate myself.i forgot how to tangent.its so easy.omg.im stupid.hahaha.den the acceleration graph thingy i wasnt sure so i did it anyhow. stil,i wil pass the maths test.i tink i'l ged a b4.=) vast improvement this whole term 3.

i mish you imran!

2005-07-31T22:27:00.000-07:00

nothing shud be bothering me.i cant focus.shitty bang bang.i studied POA.i did double entry for no reasons.stil so-so.im getting an assesment buk for dat tmr.
pissed.i cant ans a simple graph qn.as a result,i blame imran.im sori ayte.
im goin to grab a bite and wait for imran's kol.i doubt i wil be studying animore.
I DON WANNA GO TO SCHOOL TMRW.lemme fall sick please.

2005-07-31T17:27:00.000-07:00

she said i got imran's remainings.and that imran belong to her.woah.dat is evil. wait till she got my remains on her face.haha.
why muz i be affected by her words? this relationship is about me and imran so why bother bout wad she have to say? its gud dat she tinks shes better than me.she believes in herself.but in wad way? becoming a gud sex partner? haha.why tink bout SEX? im disgusted.

tomoros my maths test.kinematics and graph.im gonna kill myself if i fail the test.im doin so fine for graphs.shitty bang bang if i fail.haha.

imran and i.we sort tings out jz now.we dint quarrel.we let it all out.told hym wad i don like bout hym n stuffs.so did he.we are doin soo fine.im hepi! love u!

2005-07-28T15:21:00.000-07:00

why wont it stop? it juz kip rollin down.
ive been wronged.
this post is wholely for *her*
wads wrong? i reali am confused.the 2 babes came asking me why i wasnt in.i told em we quarelled.but that wasnt the main reason.they were asking me why i wasnt in *his* grp.i din even intend to be in *his* grp.i was told dat dey dint noe a single ting dat happened and obviousli dey dono why i wasnt in.and they were surprised.i tot u discussed it wif dem? so was it u who made the decision wholely? why did u? babe,we nid to tok.im miserable.but ure not.please.it can be over between us.if dats wad uve been wanting all along.but get all the facts rite ferst.i don wish to have any doubts on u.please.we nid to have a good chat.do holler me.

2005-07-27T16:36:00.000-07:00

yummy yummy yum yum! nutella wif mcdigestives.hmm.mummy dint cook.

spose to be miting boo.he's too busy.its ok tho.=) we'l mit erm.friday i tinkk.
i don understnd why people hate us.most of dem say bad tings abt us behind our back.they even flood our taggie wif vulgaritites.why? are we that bad? or are they jealous? hmm.i smell a rat. i was blog hopping wen i came across a properly done up blog wich belong to a lady.der she goes. bitching abt us.gerls,lets ignore her.we understand wad family bonding is.we don nid her to remind us abt how important it is.*bleargh* if vulgarities is all she can shout out,lets pretend we heard/see nuthing.our frenship will stay strong and her words wont affect us.=)

toking abt friendship.me n *her*.we'r not toking but we'r ok after an apology.i heard she nids her own space? owel,let it be den.i can see how shes enjoying life wif her other mates.and i spose she don admit that we are stil besties.wateva it is.im stil gonna be der for her if she tinks she stil nids me.wich i don tinkk so.and im trying to make it sound like im equally fine wif it (wen im not).do take care of urself.

i received a new pencil case form boo! tankiu! hehex.wad is life w/out powerpuff gerls.(",)

2005-07-25T22:30:00.000-07:00

owel.cater to you.it don sound original.stil,it mins alot.
i miss yest nyte.went we had tym for each oder.
we no longer mit most of the time.
he's busy,so am i.
its not dat we don care,we do.
but tym juz slips away.
letting us do our own thing.
thats fair enuf i suppose.

thru the ups and the downs.
we made it this far.
its been 4mths.
deres more to come.i believe.
"we've got a lifetime to be togeder,so why worry of bein apart now?"

i hope u like the 'little thing' i gave u yest nyte.dat was the best i cud do.u chose it partly.u noe the threads n stufs.u called me juz now.i wasnt surprised u dint noe wad the 'little things' are. not evryone can read my mind and ure not an exception.=) im not at all dsapointed so don be discouraged.im cool wif it.im hepi wif wat i got now.i believe tings will chnge for the better.

recalling wad we reflected yest nyte.
this relationship we'r having is a risk.
on the 26th of march,tings dont end up as planned.
it ended wif a much happier ending.more like a humorous ending.
we were laughing our hearts out yest nyte while recalling.ryte dear?
we weren't serious abt this relationship at ferst.
we didnt even love each oder at that point of tym.
but,look at us now.
we'r cool arent we.
as tym passes by,the 'thing' between us grew stronger.
out of a sudden,we realized that we love each oder too much to let go of.
and we nid each oder to move on wif life.
ain't nuthing can tear us apart.

happy 4mthsary dear.its abit too early to wish u.but the earlier the better.=) so,u asked me juz now.
"wud u marry me?"
*geez*

let fate decides after i gave u the answer juz now.for the moment,all i can say is dat i love you and i reali do.im most happy wen im wif you.its not ur cash that i wan.its ur attention and love dat i want so much.people,envy me for getting imran.ouh.hes the sweetest guy on earth.=)

*the happiest moment werent complete if u werent by my side*

It's hard to remember how it felt before
Now I found the love of my life...
Passes things get more comfortable
Everything is going right

We used to think it was impossible
Now you call me by my new last name
Memories seem like so long ago
Time alwaez kills the pain

i'L bE hApPy fOr yOu,iF yoU cAn bE hApPy fOr mE.

tHis LovE fAirytaLe wiL nevEr eNd........

2005-07-25T21:51:00.000-07:00

Baby I See You Working Hard
I Want To Let You Know I'm Proud,
Let You Know That I Admire What You Do
The More If I Need To Reassure You, My Life Would Be Purposeless Without You
If I Want It
When I Ask You
You Inspire Me To Be Better
You Challenge Me For The Better
Sit Back And Let Me Pour Out My Love Letter

Let Me Cater To You
Cause Baby This Is Your Day
Do Anything For My Man
Baby You Blow Me Away
I Got Your Slippers, Your Dinner, Your Desert, And So Much More
Anything You Want Just Let Me Cater To You
Inspire Me From The Heart,Can't Nothing Tear Us Apart
You're All That I Want In A Man;
I Put My Life In Your Hands
I Got Your Slippers, Your Dinner, Your Desert, And So Much More
Anything You Want, I Want To Cater To You

I Just Want To Take The Stress Away From You
Making Sure That I'm Doing My Part
Boy Is There Something You Need Me To Do
If You Want It
Say The Word

I Promise You
I'll Keep Myself Up
Remain The Same Chick
You Fell In Love With
I'll Keep It Tight, I'll Keep My Figure Right
I'll Keep My Hair Fixed, Keep Rocking The Hottest Outfits
When You Come Home Late
Tap Me On My Shoulder, I'll Roll Over
Baby I Heard You, I'm Here To Serve You
If It's Love You Need, To Give It Is My Joy
All I Want To Do, Is Cater To You Boy

I Want To Give You My Breath, My Strength, My Will To Be Here
That's The Least I Can Do,Let Me Cater To You
Through The Good
The Bad,The Ups And The Downs
I'll Still Be Here For You
Let Me Cater To You
Cause You're Beautiful
I Love The Way You Are
Fulfill Your Every Desire
Your Wish Is My Command
I Want To Cater To My Man
Your Heart,So Pure Your Love Shines Through
The Darkness We'll Get Through
So Much Of Me Is You
I Want To Cater To My Man

2005-07-25T15:51:00.000-07:00

to start of wif.i juz had lunch!! all tym favourite dish.sambal tumis udang. yum yum.and vanilla coke to add on wif.hehex.imran's gonna be drooling.hahahaha.
i got myself 2 body gloves tees and a roxy wallet.thnks to my mum.wee!~
i met imran yest aft erm 1 wik.we went to our normal hangout place.ecp! erm..yesterdaes miting was to "commemorate" our 4 mthsary wich is tmr.=)
i hope tings are ok between me n *her*.we sumhow apologized but we stil havent tok.she may not understnd how i fil.but at least imran does.
im readin this book.goddess society.its reali fun!
"sex isnt all bout love and love isnt all about sex"
i hope that quote rings a bell.
owel.i dont have much to say.im outz den.off to tuition.

2005-07-20T13:21:00.000-07:00

a cold morning to begin wif.my dad read imran's text msg early in the morning.i hope he noes nuthing.drop it.dint attend skul todae.running a temperature.im filing cold wen pple ard me are not.not oni dat.pms.my cramps hurt me the most.i cudnt take dinner yest.and woke up todae oni to fil hungry.had a heavy bfast.and my cramp juz wont go away.i nid the doc i gez.
i miss POA n chem test today.im prepared for POA.but not chem.dat mins,i wil have to study ltr.study wen im sick.dat wil be hard.owel,i have to.

me n *her*.we'r finali ok.we'r toking.she finali bought her indian costume she wans so much. she look pretty in it.im toking bout racial harmony celebrations here.i came in a simple top.huda n ijah wore the malay kebaya top.hahaha.dey were lyk twins.as for ijah,its the worst racial harmony eva.i heard der were misunderstandings between her frens.hm.i hope shes doin fine now.here are the pix.

ouh.not forgotting.the dinner i had wif my whole fam.had a great tym.we took pix too.here goes.

2005-07-16T14:55:00.000-07:00

sentosa outing yesterday.tiring.had fun tho.had a swim at palawan beach.wee!~ the best ting bout yesterday was....
i met my boo!
met him up for dinner at simpang.im ok now.i don fil awkward toking to him now.after so much quarellings.

sumtink wrong between us.*her* n me.she don nid me i tinkk.fine den.all the best to ya.wad are besties for if we dont seem to be on toking terms.even toking terms ok.wad more spending wif each oder.i simply don understand how tings turn out this way.wher and wen it start.even why it started.all i noe,we'r not like we used to be.walking pass each oder,not smiling.sumtyms not even a "hi" for the day.let it drag denn.

family gathering today.dinner treat by abg kamal.
update ltr.

2005-07-14T09:11:00.000-07:00

im in skul.filing lost.lethargic.life's a misery now.m tears accompanied me to slip yst nyte.and my tears begin my day today.we've been bickering over small tings.am i not gud enuf? am i asking for to much? am i too demanding? i don wan to get into details.for all i noe,this was the worst tym ive had wif hym.i hate bickering wif hym.bcoz i noe he'l be hurt and when dat happens,he wudnt be able to do anytink.but stil,i need to speak my mind.ive been tinking hard trying to figure out wher the hell i went wrong.i did it wif gud intentions.now,how else am i spose to understand him? im trying. didnt he appreciate me? i tink he did.i cant convince myself tho.

i worry that tings wil get worst one day.and when that happens,the path will be rocky.and high chances of breaking up.gosh.plz.don let that happen.i don wan it to end.never.i don fil like toking to anyone at the moment.yess.ive been kiping quiet.not as noisy as i owaez am.i dono how to face him.or even tok to him.niwae,we wont be miting so soon.bof of us are too busy.

i hope tings wil turn out fine.i love u imran.

2005-07-13T21:34:00.000-07:00

we had a fight last night
and i called him mad
makes me feel so sad
and i'm so ashamed

he's my only one
i give him all my love
even though my mom says no!
i just go on and on...

no one's gonna take him away from me..
everyday and everynight
i just wanna hold him tight
and make sure that everything stays right
and everyday and every night
to dream of him is my delight
and know that he'll stay with me all the way

2005-07-11T21:09:00.000-07:00

im blogging baby! yess i am.owel.im hoping that ure nt reading todaes post. or u'l be nagging at me again.since u insisted that i study rather than sliping.haha.tankiu for waking me up from my short nap aniwae.i love u.im spose to be studying now but im so not in the mood.will be having social studies test tmr.all the best to me.*winks* international conflicts.shud be ok.

had a great tym dancing juz now.woohoo.wif my dearies.i love dem to bits n pieces now.

ola.till here den.

2005-07-10T17:17:00.000-07:00

so i came up wif this skin yest.a bit messy.i wil edit it real soon.waiting for mizi.

went bugis wif my fam yest.had dinner at seoul garden.yummy.was sposed to be bro's treat but it turn out to be mum's treat.i got myself mickey pants! owel,sposed to buy mickey tops.but den i came across the pants wich i thought was nice so i chnge my mind and bought the pants. one ting for sure,i don reali like the colour.its lite blue.i wanted the black one.bro said the blue is nicer so i'l folow wad he saes.hehex.

attended abg kamal sis wedding reception.went der wif onli one ting on my mind.to eat. hahahaha.was expecting the food to be like the one kak nura had for her wedding.owel,it wasnt. i prefer kak nura's wedding food.stil,the dhal thingy was nice.hahha.i like the dessert most.the whyte thingy called.err.i aint sure.its nice tho! creamy.milky.my mummy told me not to take alot of rice bcoz she was afraid i cudnt finish it.haha.i porve her wrong.she was shock.bcoz besides having the briyani,i had roti naan.hahaha.my mum took 3 for the bof of us to share.she was already full so i finish up 2 naans while she ate oni 1.surprisingly,i wasnt dat full.haha.

HAPPY BURFDAE ABG KAMAL.
im so looking forward to ur bday treat next wik.i wont be busy.don weri.=)

hoping to mit imran later.

at skul

2005-07-07T23:37:00.000-07:00

im in skul now.malay class.doin nuthing.boring.imran's not here wif me.i miss hym.he dint attend skul.if i'd known,i wudnt attend skul too.hmph! ok.he wasnt filing well.dharroea. im hoping to mit hym real soon.i mish you.

i lost my water bottle during canteen duty.my fav water bottle.shuckx.baby,how?

i don tink i'l be coming for todaes trainig.we'l c how.im so not in the mood.outta here. bubbye.

i love u imran.mit me soon! muax!

100 days.n we'r stil counting.

2005-07-03T22:02:00.000-07:00

had lotsa fun dancing juz now! hehex.one more song to go and we'r ready for the auditions. and the sad ting is,amsyar wont be able to contribute anymore steps since hes been contributing alot of steps for the previous 2 songs and other teams.now its all left wif us.congrats to abg kamal who won the torchbearer competition AGAIN.my bro did ok on the ferst day but ltr cocked up on the 2nd day.nvm.try again next year ayte.kak nura did a great job i shud sae.she stand till the 19th position i tinkk.woah.i supported 204.hehex.this handsome guy.i tot he was kiut.still.im in love wif mr imran. *winks* its our 100 days tmr.

for now.hmm.the truz is not der yet.hes doubting me sumtyms.but its reali fine.its my fault for making hym jealous moz of the tyms.but i can fil dat love is in the air.bof of us are floating. lovey dovey couples.no monkey business.its gonna be for real.we do quarrel.we seldom quarrel last tym.but now.abit err.stil,we make sure we get it over n done wif.usuali the argument lasted for a few minutes.paling lamer pon hmm ard 2hrs or so.den we'l tok.bcoz obviously,lifes a bore wen we'r not toking to each oder.hes doin so well now.becoming more n more noisier.i LoiKe. hehex.but he nids to understand me better.niwae,im stil hepi wif u dear.our plan is a must-must go on.i love u imran.

ending here for now.desperate housewives on tv.toddles!~

schools in...hols out..

2005-06-30T15:12:00.000-07:00

skul was ok..a great start i tinkk on monday..tho my daddy dint drive me to skul..i was accompanied by my sizlupp.yay! and i wasnt late. =) homeworks almoz completed. im quite satisfied wif the life i have now except dat im broke. shall not tok bout how broke i am. racial harmony is reali soon.havent had any idea of wad to wear.
mum dint cook AGAIN today.im so pissed.here i am wif maggie.yummy yummy! wil be goin tuition ltr.
i mit imran yest! he sent me home.hes back from kL.hehex.received a call from hym at ard 645pm.i was so so HIGH wen i heard hys voice.i missed hym.alot. i met hym on last sunday.our 3mthsary.we chilled. gez wad.i got a mickey mouse blouse! pink! yay!! hehex.tankiu. mMuUacKkSs.. heeh.so dats lyk my 3mthsary present and my 3rd gift from hym.i tinkk my 4th gift.yeaa.bof of us work it out real nyce.im glad.life was hectic w/out hym tho its oni for 4 days.owel.im back wif hym.im glad.

call me!

2005-06-26T16:13:00.000-07:00

i dint have a goodnyte slip.lookin forward to mit him soon.at least a call.

skul starts tmr.alot more to catch up wif.especiali POA.im so lost.ive completed my hwk.but not all.what worries me most is not my undone hwk but my coming syllabus.lets pray i wil be able to cope wif it.studying starts tmr.NOT today.

baked brownies today.abit different.stil its delicious to me.except that it isnt dat chocolatey.and ders walnuts.i don favour nuts.my mum bought the pack.not me! and my dad chooses the flavour.not me! i hope dey eat.if dey dont,it wil go straight into sri's mouth.haha.

happy 3mthsary to me....

hAppy 3mthsAry

2005-06-26T00:00:00.000-07:00

hAppy 3mthsAry dEar..itS bAd eNuf nOt hAvinG u heRe wiF mE..

communication breakdown

2005-06-25T22:53:00.000-07:00

kAtybEdAh & bOnuL
im sorie gerls. i dint inform u bout my absence yesterday. i had my own reasons for doin so.

miMimOK
i fiL it gerl wen we had the long gurl talk at msn last wik. honestly,i felt i was too sensitive.yes. i do agree.adz,sri,iza can make it.der was a BIG misunderstanding at that moment of tym.i was at fault too sumhow.sorie dearies.i miss y'all.i miss dose tyms we had.the tyme we had our pix taken at istana park.we were towning that tym.becoming fools.and we had a long makeover at my homey.rememba? yea.i miss dose tyms too.

rObiNhoOd
hoLa.been a long tym since i heard from u.ystrdae was a pleasant surprise.hakz.dint expect u to shout out to me.the advices.woah.ure a great shooter.hehex.shoot me at the right time. its over between us.we seperate for a reason.it was a boring relationship.ive moved on.and u did too. i appreciate dose advices.im~iza wil last.=) we are gonna compromise.tankiu fie.toodles!~

mOhAmAd iMrAn biN fAdzLan
darlin.i mish u.it wil be our 3mthsary tmr.be back soon.i wan to watch the moon wif you again!before u left on thurs,u left me wif anader surprise.the bag dat ive been asking for.tankiu! dat wil be my new sumtink for skul. the reef slipper.ive been taking care of it.but don scold me for getting it dirty.hehehe. syng,favour bole? i wan the pro-keds pumps.can? kiter share2 duit nk? hehex.we'l catch a movie real soon.and tis tym it wil be on me.we watch alot like love k? my fish & co.quick! im waiting.i cudnt get u anyting for our 3mthsary.im stil tinking hard wat i shud get for u at tis tym.its abit too late.maybe i'l make sumtink or i'l bake sumtink for u.i cant wait to mit u dear. ive got lotsa stories to tell ya! muax!

kAk hudA
eyy.congrats! nnt kiter g riding k? the vespa.its reali nice.i LoOikE!

currently.home alone.i gotta study.before skul starts.ive set my goals for this coming term yest.i wanna achieve it.

2005-06-23T16:22:00.000-07:00

i miss hym aredi.its oni been a day w/out hym.who am i gonna turn to wen im hving probs wif my mumma.i hate tis feeling.

everyday is special

2005-06-23T13:54:00.000-07:00

a boring day.fucked up wif mum.scolded early in the morning.like wth.she shudnt compare me n bro.seriousli.have a heart mann.was scolded ferstly for waking up late.wich is at 10am.i slept late yest nyt.was on the fon wif my boo.my last "nyt" wif hym since he'l be away for 3days to kL.foged bout mummy.i nid to be a lil patient.cleaned up my room again.anader revamp.proud bcoz its well-organized now.
told imran i cudnt get anyting new wen skul reopen.usuali i'l have sumtink new.im sposed to ged the nike bag before skul reopen but heyy.not enuf cash.stil saving up.bout havin new bag,realy depends on my bro's fren.ordered a rattan bag lyk 2 wiks ago from bro's fren.lets hope he/she can get it real soon.i tinkk its a SHE la.i dono if a rattan bag is suitable for skul.niwae,it takes one to start wat.lets hope i'l be the ferst to start.ive ordered a bigger one since it wil be for skul.ive got a small blue one.n it sure cant fit my books.niwae,if i cant get the rattan bag...i'l have my nike bag.yay!! hehex.
imran..i miss you darlin..i noe.its oni 3 days.3 days without a single call or a single msg kills me.we'v never been apart from each oder.very very cliquish.honestly,we'r a totali different couple.from my previous r/l i don reali care whether or not he call or he msg.but for u.its a total NO.maybe bcoz i reali treasure u.not lyk my past r/l wich i dint treasure.*winks*
i wanna recall dat nyte now.remember our nyte stay at east coast last wik.on the 16th n 17th.i miss those tyms.
we spent the whole nyte together.had a great tyme.i wanna list evrytinkk we did.i wan to remember dat nyte.
met up at tamp mrt.u were late.hakz.u stuffed ur bag into mine.=)listened to ur ipod while we were in the train.headed to town.hm.we did nuthink.juz window shopped.we bought candy from CANDYSHOP at annex.hekx.*winks*we were the stupidest couple der.walking all ard the shop oni to find out that evry part of the shop sells the same kind of candy.and u were finding ur banana candy.ur all tym favourite since u were young.we cudnt find the banana candy so we had others.we left town around 7+.changing of train took us a long tym to reach bedok.we oni boarded the train from ct hall at 8.reached bedok.baby got the tent.while leaving me at the playground ALONE.hakz.sposed to walk to the very very far bstp.as soon as we riched the bsstp,we decided to take a cab.wich is so stupid.had a long walk aredi.den change of plan.so.we reached ecp.the lace wher we were sposed to pitch our tent.den,der was no bathing area.took anader cab to the bathing area.aft a bath,went back to the place wher we were spose to pitch our tent.took a cab.mcm orng kaya sakk kiter.ok.den.baby pitched the tent.i dint help much.hahahaha.settled down.had a nyte together.we did nuthing of the sort.bof of us noe,its not the ryte tym yet.and im worth waiting for.the place wher we got our tent pitched was the ferst place we dated.hehex.at the waterbreaker.and dat was wher our fairytale begins.on the 26th of march.at around 1030.i was tired dat nyte.i had sum slip.and i tot he did too.owel,he didnt.all along while i was sliping,he was looking at me.malu nyerr.hehe.he oni slept ard 5am.bof of us woke up around 7.strike tent.den sat on a bench and had a long chat.aft dat,we walked to the bathing area.after our bath,we went to parkway parade.thru 31.in de bus,we recalled the nyte again.hmm.had bfast at banquet.he fed me.the whole dish.i fil like a princess.we took 31.and took the wrong bus.we went the wrong way.alighted at kallang n took de mrt.hehex.we were stupid.haha.but the stupidest one was me.i told hym to take 31 n not to cross.owel,normal me.blur queen.he sent me home.rite til my void deck.its not the usual hym sending me til my void deck.its usuali til the void deck opposyte minehmm.i love u dear.i noe dat u wont forget that nyte.last thurs,we cud spent tyme tgthr.but todae,u had to leave me to kL.be back soon darling.he juz told me he'l be back on sunday nyte instead of saturday nyte.while ive planned to mit hym on sunday and celebrate our 3mthsary.nvm.we'l do it sumoder tyme.like u said.
everyday is a special day for us.i love you imran.

cuzins?

2005-06-21T11:27:00.000-07:00

eyy...cuzins ku..ade gathering ehk for fathers day? how cum i dint noe..its so near yet so far..kt airport ehk? tk baiknyerr tk ajak kiter! i cud hve went mann..mkn swensens lagik..and Bk..gawd.....i mish cik minah's family among all..kak zira all have ehk? asl tk blng~!! my fam dint make any plans for fathers day..ciannyer bapak aku..and its been a long tym since i met cik jo's fam..after dey came back from kL..
eyy cuzins..mit up ar before my skul reopen..chill wif me mann..imran's gone on thurs..tkkan aku nk dok uma jer sakk..fatimah,join aku buat hwk ar..den u can help me wif POA and maths kk? i lup u!
*kip me updated la klau ade gathering....*sobs*

[anader gfs dae]

2005-06-20T21:03:00.000-07:00

he was der for me ystrdae nyt.to chus btwn a loyal fren or a fren hus secretive bcoz she does not wan u to be hurt.he said a loyal fren is better.i tot so too.im not afraid to be truthful to my gfs animore.i cant kip tings to myself.i don fil right.i tot i was lying to myself by doin so.

sri n ijah was at my house.editted sum pics.i'l upload de pic one day.deciding on songs to remix for the dance-x comp.fareez! help me! decide! asap.well,if ure readin tis.mebb thar or zhaf mite help me out here.plz! had lotsa fun wif my gfs jz now.sri's so pretty.now dat she rebond back her hair.more like kakak2.haha.stil ders a kid in her.i fil lyke gettin my hair perm again.its so so cheap.i tinkk i shud.soon! real soon! imran,can?

MadAgaScaR

2005-06-17T14:10:00.000-07:00

madagascar! wee!~ we'v been into the wild together dear! hehex. mOve it! mUAcks!
i had fun.i love you! dose tym we spent meant especially more to me. =)

no more wating.

2005-06-16T11:41:00.000-07:00

i don have to wait.no more!! so looking forward to today.i can mit ma boo! yay! in a few hrs tyme.yay!

my new skin.

2005-06-15T23:00:00.000-07:00

yay! finali a new skin.
here goes.woke up in the morning filing lethargic.bad bad flu.
chilled.come up wif tis new skin.
received an sms from my tutor and confirmed bout de tuition todae.oni received the msg at 330. and im spose to reach der by 5.i havent bathe.i havent iron my clothes.i was SUPPOSED to be late.
was in a rush.and i THOUGHT i was late.but i wasnt.i had to go alone.imran wasnt free.fine den.im trying to be independent here and become a gud gerlfren for once.*winks* i hope he appreciates me all along.left home ard 4.
since i wasnt late......
i went to giordano to get my altered pants.and i windowshopped ALONE.dat is so not me. im proud.haha.i saw some tops.im eyeing on it.for now,im stil saving up to ged de nike bag.maybe after i ged myself the nike bag,i'l save up to ged some tops.hmm....
it was aredi 430 i tinkk or later.i was at pasir ris library.the library was alryte.hm.not dat big.owel.the books were boring.but i managed to grab tis book.and i was so keen to read it.i browsed thru.its a book about mickey mouse.bout disney characters.it was the same exact one dat i saw at temasek poly.i was overjoyed.so yea.i went to the counter.filing so high.and confident.since i got imran's card.and i tot der wasnt any fines.wich mins i can borrow the book.
but well.was dsapointed.der was fines.it was done my aini.hmm.nvm.i'l clear it den.since i dint bring my cashcard,i left the library without borrowing any book.
i reached my tutor's house ard 510.i wasnt dat late.no one was der.so i had all the tyme wif my tutor.shes great.we were toking crap most of the tyme actuali.haha.
i was about to left wen i saw kyra.gawd.shes sumhow related to my bro.hes fling or sumtink lyk dat.and i once had a good talk to her.ok.i hate her at that moment.now that we'r in de same class,i have to befriend her.i thought dat shudnt be any prob.she seems ok.=)

i cant wait to mit u dear! i miss you!

2005-06-13T16:41:00.000-07:00

can anyone define life? evryone sees it thru a different perspective.
whats life to me? am i enjoyin evry single moment of it? i am at the moment. bcoz ive got imran. but wil it last? wad if it doesnt? i noe i have to live life to the fullest.ok.maybe i have my sizlup. but,frens come and go. lets hope dey wil stay.but wad if dey dont?
i nid to noe wad being independent exactly means.
i cant depend on the people around me all the time.i nid to do tings alone at times too.
im trying to recall.wad have i done alone? wad have i accomplished alone? nothing.
it worries me.
how am i gonna faced up to the real world wen i grow older?
i gotta start now.
but the thought of standing on my own feet.doin it all alone.eww.dat is so not me.

2005-06-09T17:22:00.000-07:00

its been a bad day.a bad bad one.i don ged it.why must she ged mad over small tings.stop being too sensitive man.shes the reason why i hate staying at home.stop bossing around wil u.wad else do u wan.havent i help u wif the housework juz now? i woke up earlier than before so that i cud spent my tym wif you since ure not werking.but wad do i get in return? im hanging on.stil.

im undergoing a veri rough patch.i nid to be patient.well.cant be blamed.shes having PMS.shes worst than me.i have imran stil.tankiu dear.u made me fil better.

2005-06-08T19:44:00.000-07:00

i dOn't have what it TAkEs to be YouRs

2005-06-06T00:24:00.000-07:00

=we took dat pic on our way home from town on saturday=

SATURDAY
anader day out wif my darling.to town.ferst tym g town ngn imran tk gi heeren.thank god.we owaez dropby heeren.since dats the nearest mall after dropping at somerset.persuaded him to go sumwher else.imran brought me to tis weird place for lunch.the food is reali nice.tankiu dear. nanti bilang i lagi tmpt mkn yg sedap2 k.hehex.i enjoy evry moment wif u.=) doesnt reali matter wher we are.

was at kak nura's new house juz now.at bukit batok.helped her clean up de house since shes movin in real soon.very very troublesome to have a new house.but its great getting a new house actuali.haha.like.u have ur own family wif u.ur own house wher u can do anyting and evryting.
i wil have my own house one day.it sure fils great.got to catch up wif my cuzins a lil.since not evryone was der.kak nura sent us home.gez wad.we were aredi at the doorstep wen bro realized he forget de house keys.no one was at home.dad was away at malaysia. mum was werking. we had to wait for half an hour at the void deck.mum had her break at 1130.we took a cab to mum's workplace and took de hse key.VERY VERY troublesome.

i cant slip.im waiting for imran's call.call me quick!

2005-06-02T16:30:00.000-07:00

tentang dia. yepp. dats the title. its a great indonesia movie. more to teenage life stories. like ada apa dengan cinta. tis is lyke the continuation.erm.no. i shudnt put it dat way. its a total different story wif a totally different storyline and endings. hm. the producer and composer was the same. melly goeslaw. shes great at producing heart felt movies. hex.

i shud share the story. its about dis chic named "gadis" whose in dilemma. she was hurt once. betrayed by her boyfriend and her best fren. her boyfren ended up fallin in love wif her best fren. (lets pray dat wont happen to me too) so,Gadis dint wanna move on wif life. anader popular guy in skul has fallen for gadis. (shytz. i forgot the guy's name) Gadis ignored dat guy. hm. Gadis met wif an accident and dat is wher she gets to know a kind-hearted lady. and yar. i forgot her name. hex. dey were bestfrens. tis lady tot Gadis alot. and chnge Gadis perspective towards LOVE and LIFE. tis lady was in de same state as Gadis so she noe wad exactly Gadis is filing. ok. bla.bla.bla.tis lady met wif an accident and died. Gadis was back to her dilemma thingy. bcoz shes been losing all her loved ones. and it was a heavy blow for her wen she lost her new fren. bla.bla.bla.in de end,Gadis fall in love wif dat popular guy. i shud sae. Gadis made a right choice in loving dat popular guy. hes bin doin lotsa tings for Gadis. and yea. he promised he'l not leave Gadis lyk how each person has left her life. yeaa.so dats the story.

NOW.my storie.imran bought me reef flip-flops!! hex. i was de happiest gerl yesterday. had a great tyme bein wif hym. to lavendar and den to town. i fil for u dear. its ok if u cant go darwin. ada hikmah disebaliknya. =) stay strong.ur smile makes me happy. try harder next tym. i noe u can. look on de bright side. if ure nt goin darwin,dat means u can be wif me in spore. if ure not goin darwin,dat means u can stil go to school.i noe how much u hate schooling. u shud noe dat u'l be sitting for ur O's. and to do well,u have to attend the extra classes. biar susa skrng and den tings wil be much easier for u in future. =) or i shud sae tings wil be much easier for US.
ure stil my star and de best player.love you.

2005-05-31T22:43:00.000-07:00

heres anader since im reali bored..i cant ged to slip..its stil earli..ders nuthing to watch on tv.. miss universe was boring..im so tempted to watch monster in law but nvm..since i'l be watchin it wif imran..i mite as well wait..patience iza..
im hungry..but i cant bring myself to eat..i noe i cant..i had puffs for bfast..abit of fried rice..den off i went..to the loo..gawd..i vomitted..ALOT..im kinda bloated..maner tk nye..gi beach tpi tk mkn..masok angin ar..iza pe bodo..as long as i enjoyed myself ystrdae nyte..im fine..i miss imran..it seems like i havent cuddle ard hym fer such a long tym..and im longing for it NOW..i don have a choice..i have to wait..im falling out of my elements..i cant kol hym..i cant tok to hym..hes not at home..hes off to ecp again..i fil so shytty not hearing ur voice or having ur touch and kiss ur lips..i mish u!! wassup wif tis lovey dovey stuffs..nahh..its nice to let it all out..hehez..

before he left..he buzzed me..all i can say was..de convo we had was reali suckky.it was ok at ferst..den it wasnt..aft awhile,it turn out fine..now..its aredi strting..plz..not anader heartbreak pleash..its been 2 mths..plz..kip it moving..i don wan any quarrels please..don doubt me imran..im trying not to..i love you..i reali do..i hope ure reading it..maybe not tonyte..maybe tomoro..kol me soon baby..

2005-05-31T15:32:00.000-07:00

hm.i can never imagine life without them.sizlupp.my family.cuzins.imran.
had a great tym at east coast yesterdae.imran's rugby boys pit.i love u dear.u were awesome yesterday.especiali wen u sang dat gsc song.haha.nice! taufik turn up from nowhere.geez.

nuthings up todae.rotting at home.praying n hoping evrytink wil turn out juz fine.imran's getting his results todae.lets hope he'l be selected to darwin.plz.plz.
wadeva de outcome is,stay strong.uve got me stil.

hm.i read my chem txbk jz now.shytz.i forgot evrytink.i nid to strt tuition soon.or im gonna flnk it again.dat is so not happening bcoz i wanna move on to sec4 and leave damai asap.den,strt a new life.in TP.ged myself a diploma n strt werking.den blah.blah.blah.its a drim dat must come true.